By: TuxRainbow
Started: 2/10/2005
Naoko Takeuchi is hereby thanked for her involuntary contribution to this fanfic. YingGirl is thanked for giving Dr. Xadium the idea for this contest. TuxRainbow and Sailor Terra are creations of this author, and are used for effect only in this ending.
Anyway, on with the show.
"AND THEY SAID IT COULDNT BE DONE!" Professor Tomoe shouted, "BUT I DID IT. DR. EMMITT L. BROWN BE [BLEEP]ED!"
Haruka looked at the changed convertible. The Flux capacitor (Patent pending) was fluxing.
"That is the [BLEEP], Haruka responded, but what does it run on?"
Tomoe coughed, "PLUTONIUM, OF COURSE."
"You stole Plutonium?" Haruka questioned.
"BORROWED", Tomoe stated, "KIM JONG IL WASNT HAPPY, BUT I DID HACK HIS BLOG." *
* And you wonder why he hasnt been on it in so long
Haruka was smiling.
"I just hope you have a Daimon or two in case this thing shorts." Haruka stated.
"ALWAYS HAVE SOME REJECTS READY," Tomoe responded. "ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS GET IT UP TO 88MPH".
"Baby, I can do 188 in my sleep", Haruka responded, "88 is nothing".
Tomoe set the controls to the 30th Century, and the Ferrari peeled out. As soon as 88 was hit (which was a few seconds), the 4th Dimension was broken.
"I repeat," Haruka responded as they jumped into time, "this is the [BLEEP]!"
Jedites army of controlled cosplaying Senshi was steadily growing. Soon, he would have enough to overrun Crystal Tokyo, and change it from a theme park to the new HQ of the Dark Kingdom HIS Dark Kingdom.
Mars cosplayers, Minako cosplayers, hell, even a few Tuxedo Rainbow Cosplayers were in the mix.
"Follow me blindly to the Queen, where we shall rend the throne from her dead hands", commanded Jedite.
The horde of fans followed him around. Jedite was happy when he was his most evil.
Outside, Haruka's Ferrari parked in the Sailor Uranus area hitting a few other cars in the process.
"30 points", Haruka responded.
Tomoe shrugged. At least, he made the car mostly sturdy. Now, if only things would be smoother and nothing else would go wrong...
Nearby, two familiar Suburban Senshi chatters looked on.
"I told you not to come here, but Noooo..." chastised Sailor Terra, "you had to see how Dr. Xadium made Crystal Tokyo."
Tuxedo Rainbow sighed. He just wanted to see if the rumors were correct (which they were), and leave.
"A tourist trap, indeed," TuxRainbow responded, "$50 to get in?"
"We could have gone to Neo Tokyo 7 or Duelist Kingdom III, but you had to pick the most crappy place there is." Terra responded.
"Haruka?" TuxRainbow asked.
"Hey, Tux, Terra," Haruka responded. Professor Tomoe waved.
"Well, we arent alone," Terra responded.
"They're trying to save Artemis, if I recall," TuxRainbow responded.
"Yup," Haruka responded, "but I wouldnt mind a piece of Neo Queen Serenity."
"From what I hear, she's not the good Queen we know," Terra mentioned.
"Look around, Terra-chan," Haruka responded, "I dont think a theme park is what I would want to live in."
Suddenly, music began to play.
(Sung, briefly, to the tune of Its a Small World After All)
Its Chibi-Usa's Birthday after all
Its a birthday, after all.
Its a birthday after all.
Its a sweet time, after all
Its Chibi-Usa's birth-day.
"No wonder Zoi-chan hates that song," Terra responded, trying to make an obscure reference.
"Let me guess, The Queen is so lax in her duties, she lets the Spore have her birthday every day," TuxRainbow responded.
"I guess so," Haruka responded.
TuxRainbow sighed.
"Let's take the Spore out," he responded.
"I WOULDN'T DO THAT" , Professor Tomoe responded.
"Okay, we capture her, take her back, and then kill her," Terra responded.
"You must have been hanging around Jedite too long, Terra-chan," Haruka responded.
Terra giggled.
"Lets go," TuxRainbow responded.
"All I want to do is prove that Luna is Diana's", Artemis responded, "is that too much to ask?"
Ami looked upon Artemis, and smiled.
"Thank goodness I dont have to repair any robots today, or any rides," Ami responded, "although I have to set up for the fireworks later. I'll assist."
Hotaru looked around.
"Where did Yuuchiro run off to?" she asked.
"Hes still looking for Rei, I guess", Minako responded, "I guess absence really does make the heart go yonder."
"That's 'Make the heart grow fonder'", Hotaru corrected.
"I guess I will follow you, for the moment," Minako responded, "at least my talents are not needed."
"Which ones?" Artemis asked.
Minako sweat dropped.
Yuuchiro walked through several Hotaru cosplayers, still looking for his Rei. Even as he climbed the steps, Rei was not there.
"Rei-san," he shouted, "your knight in shining armor is here."
When he arrived at the temple, several Mars and Rei cosplayers accosted him.
"It's just another Yuuchiro cosplayer", one responded.
Another called him Chad.
(Darn dub)
"You are all not the Rei-chan I know," Yuuchiro responded, "where is she?"
"Not here," responded a good Rei cosplayer, doing the flame meditation thing, "she is busily warding off evil spirits, in preparation for tonight. She said nothing about a Yuuchiro, ever since she has been here."
"I wanted her to be my girlfriend," Yuuchiro, stated, crying, "and I came here for nothing. She's more interested in keeping this place afloat that in me."
"I'll be your girlfriend", the cosplayer responded.
"If I can't have Rei,l'll be a bachelor, and since shes forgotten me, I will forget her." Yuuchiro stated, storming off.
He added, "Sensei was right, I should have gone after one of those athletic girls."
The cosplayer sighed. "He is too good. Hes got to be the best cosplayer of Yuuchiro on the planet."
Ami looked at the device, sighing. Yes, this will work, but Luna is quite paranoid. Without the Queen to tell her to do this, she'll think its some anal probe or something.
Minako sighed, and lapsed into her Queen's Double imitation.
"We'll have to get her to do it, then," Minako stammered, "and we know where she is."
Minako jogged off.
"I hope this works," Artemis responded, "I hate to see my family break up."
"Man this place is about as bad as Tokyo Disney," Haruka responded, "except there isn't a mouse here to beat up on."
Haruka took out her frustration on a Seiya cosplayer.
Professor Tomoe looked around a bit.
"Well, we know Hotaru is here, somewhere," TuxRainbow responded.
"As well as Jedite and Minako," Terra added.
From behind Terra, a familiar pink-headed girl arrived.
"Sew, u 2 r hear," she responded.
"Spore!" TuxRainbow shouted.
"Eye jus wented 2 sai high," Chibi-Usa responded, "an 2 find Elioz"
"Horse boy?" Terra responded.
"Yasss, ham." Chibi-Usa responded.
"Listen, Sporeterrible," Haruka responded, "I am having a bad day. If you dont want to be gutted, I suggest you leave, now."
"I don wanna gow!" Chibi-Usa shouted, "I don wanna!"
She bounced Luna-P, turning it into a leash.
"Ill huk it on tu yoo if yoo don let mi kome bac 2 the pre-zent 2 see elioz," Chibi-Usa responded.
"No [BLEEP]ing way", Haruka responded.
"I agree", TuxRainbow responded.
Terra sighed.
"Lets find the others", she stated.
Near the Ferrari, a dark shadow was forming. No, it was not one of the Professor's experiments gone awry. This foe was familiar with the Queen, very, very familiar. Five times, this foe had lost, and it knew that the next time they met, it would win, but lose.
It knew that it had told the Queen who it was, but that the Queen had forgotten. It could feel the power of the Dark Kingdom, and drew upon it, but not enough to send a clear signal. It wanted the attack to be a surprise, and the winner would be the being who took Galaxia, who killed the Senshi once before, who took nearly all the star seeds of the universe Chaos.
Luna woke up from her usual cat nap, and walked out of the chambers. She was still paranoid at the fact that the test was wrong, in her care.
She heard what sounded like Neo Queen Serenity's voice.
"You have to come with me, so that your paranoia can be cured," it stated.
"Queen?" Luna responded, "come where?"
"Follow my voice", it stated.
Luna did so, following the voice out of the castle. She swore she heard Setsuna and Mamoru kissing even though she knew that Pluto had tried to make herself fully Plutonian by breaking every one of the Queen's Time Travel Rules. Still, having someone as powerful as Pluto on your side (for whatever reason) is a good thing.
As she followed the voice, she realized it was not the real queen, but it was too late. Minako captured her, and took her away.
If Minako had stayed but one moment longer, she would have heard the real queen demanding to know where she was.
"You satisfied that this is a tourist trap now?" Terra responded.
"Okay, next time, I let you decide where we go on vacation," TuxRainbow responded.
Terra smiled.
Minako sped by them, followed closely behind by Hotaru.
"Hotaru," TuxRainbow asked, "what is up?"
"Haruka-papa?" Hotaru asked.
Haruka nodded.
"Jedite is heading for the castle, to usurp the Queen," Hotaru responded.
"Let him," Terra responded., "it will give the fake Queen a workout."
"I think we need to be elsewhere," TuxRainbow responded, as several cosplayers arrived, looking for autographs.
"I dont mind this," Terra responded, "but males cosplaying me? Its a bit too much."
TuxRainbow led the group after Minako.
Retinal scanners, cameras, and voice sensors were outdated technology to one as old as Chaos. All it needed to do was use the merest amount of the darkest energies known to Senshi and knight , and short it out. Now, it needed to find the Queen that would be easy, thanks to Jedite.
"This will only take a second, Luna," Ami replied, using the device Artemis stole.
"You are not Ami, you are a clone, an alien. Thats a probe! An anal probe!" Luna responded.
Even though she was restrained by Minako, Luna was still giving them all the worst ideas as to what the device was used for. Ami had allowed for Diana to escape the Spore, er, Chibi-Usa long enough to make sure that the first test was just wrong.
"Paternal test still checks out", Ami responded.
"Thank goodness," Artemis responded, as Professor Tomoe and Haruka entered, followed by TuxRainbow, Terra and Chibi-Usa.
"Hello, Neko," Haruka responded.
"Sew, this iz anuther tezt?" Chibi-Usa responded.
"One to take place of the one you botched!" Artemis responded.
"Looks like the maternal test was botched," Ami responded, "Luna is Diana's mother."
"I am sorry, Artemis," Luna said calmly," Looks like Usagi's X-file like theories got into my head."
"At least that is settled," Minako responded, looking at the time.
"Kuso," Minako responded, "I am so late!"
But it was already too late, as the Queen barged in.
"Do you know what I had to go through to get here! I HATE giving out autographs to commoners! I hate having to break up my husband and that slut Setsuna! And I hate it when my double is late! I know I have been lax, Luna, but I thought that Minako would take over. And yes, I know you tricked Luna, I have proof! I have tape! I just wanted a little time off!" Usagi ranted.
"Just like the old Usagi," Terra remarked.
"I am the queen!" Usagi shouted, "I should not be out here, having to drag Luna back to the castle! I should not have to break up my husband and Setsuna! she turned to Terra and TuxRainbow, and asked, and who the bloody HFIL are you two?"
"She forgot," TuxRainbow responded.
"Just like the old Usagi," Luna responded.
Usagi could hear the castle crumble. "No my hard work.."
"Jedite," Hotaru responded.
"So, old Jedite things that just because I havent used the Ginzuishou for so long, that I cant give him a good fight? Ill meet him in the center of my realm and have all the people here pay for it."
"You can take the Queen out of the castle, but you cant take the castle out of the Queen," Terra responded.
"Holy {BLEEP]!" Haruka interrupted, "this will be as good of a fight as when Videl fought Suppovich, but without the interference."
"You and your Budokais," Hotaru responded, as Haruka began to chant for Mister Satan.
"Come and face me, Neo-Queen Stupidity," Jedite thundered, "all your Crystal Tokyo belong to me!"
Jedite demonstrated a small amount of his vast evil ki by blasting a hole into the Palace, and averted his eyes when he saw where the hole was.
"Put some clothes on, Time Hag," Jedite responded.
Setsuna, disappeared, never commented that she was never there. Mamoru was left alone.
"Next time, I stay with Usako," he replied.
Suddenly, Neo Queen Serenity rushed to the scene.
"You dare take Setsuna from her chambers!" she raged, "you will pay!"
"No, you shall pay with your life!" Jedite responded.
The two started to fight, and Jedite, being the more practiced in his art, had the advantage.
Hotaru, Minako, Artemis, Professor Tomoe, Haruka, TuxRainbow and Terra arrived just seconds after the battle started.
"Man this will be some fight," Haruka responded.
Sailor Terra looked around, sensing something.
While the two ancient enemies fought, Chaos simply sauntered into the area known as Crystal Tokyo, and began to draw energy from its patrons. Soon, it grew into a near human form, and began to destroy the crappiest place on Earth, in Terras opinion.
"Where is she? Where is the Queen?" Chaos asked, "This place will be destroyed if she does not come!"
The battle between Jedite and the Queen was definitely in the favor of Jedite. Even though Neo Queen Serenity had the Ginziushou, but had not used it since arriving here. She was about to lose, and lose her throne.
Terra interrupted.
I sense an evil, dark presence, she replied.
Neo-Queen Serenity heard screams. "This isnt over, Jedite," she replied, "but the protection of my area comes first."
Jedite also sensed it, and tried to stop her.
"You dont know what you are getting into," Jedite responded, "I know that energy. Thats Chaos."
Neo-Queen Serenity pushed Jedite aside. "So, we havent been formally introduced, but I will destroy it just the same, she" replied.
"She doesnt know that last time, it took all her power and Sailor Cosmos to defeat it", Terra responded.
(check the last act of the Manga)
TuxRainbow nodded, "we may need more power than what she has," he stated.
Haruka and Jedite merely looked at each other, as Chaos walked its way towards the castle, destroying everything in its path.
"Much as I hate to say this, Tux-boy is right," Jedite responded, "Haruka and I may need to fuse."
Haruka nodded.
"Its been some time, but I think we can beat it," Haruka responded.
"Professor, get the time machine ready," Terra responded.
"AGREED," the Professor responded.
"Hotaru, we may also need your powers," TuxRainbow responded.
Sailor Saturn appeared before him.
"I will be glad to send this beast to the pits of Hell, even at the cost of this mockery that is Crystal Tokyo," Saturn responded.
Minako thought for a moment.
"Is it okay if I come with you to the past? I'm beginning to hate being cooped up here. Theres nothing fun to do." she replied.
"If she's going, then so am I," added Artemis, "at least, what I wanted to do is done."
"Fine, fine, you two can come along, but dont get cat hair on the upholstery," Haruka responded.
"I don't shed on fine leather", Artemis responded.
Meanwhile, Neo Queen Serenity began to look for her adversary. "You are here somewhere, Daimon, she stated, come out."
"I am as far from them as they are from me," a voice stated.
"Who are you?" the Queen asked.
"Come now, surely you do not forget a name such as Chaos," the voice stated.
"Doesnt ring a bell," Neo Queen Serenity remarked.
"Galaxia?" Chaos asked.
"That name I recall. Beat her and her evil half," Neo Queen Serenity stated, "and that is the last time I fight without a fuku on."
"That evil portion you so mistakenly call Galaxia was me," Chaos stated.
"I can still beat you," Neo Queen Serenity remarked.
Jedite knew Chaos was near, and that Neo Queen Serenity would have to fight it.
"Lets get this fusion over with," Jedite responded, "and destroy Chaos, or at least, delay it."
Haruka and Jedite got into position to fuse.
"I never thought Id see the fusion dance," TuxRainbow remarked.
"Fuuu," both shouted.
"Remind me to ask how to do it," Terra responded.
"I thought you like *our* kind of fusion," TuxRainbow remarked.
Terra blushed.
"sion" Jedite and Haruka continued, doing the movements correctly.
"I hope this works," Minako responded.
"Haaaaa!" The two shouted, touching each other in the correct way, ending the dance.
(And not in *that* way, you hentai)
?
A bright light blinded Minako, TuxRainbow and Terra, and in front of them all stood Jeruka.
"Lets save the pleasantries. Queen Serenity doesnt know who she is fighting," Jeruka stated, flying off.
"Saturn, I hope youre ready," Terra responded.
Saturn merely nodded.
Meanwhile, in the parking lot, Professor Tomoe was having a problem.
"FLUX CAPACITOR FLUXING," he remarked, "ENGINE RUNNING, GAS OK AHA! FORGOT THE PLUTONIUM!"
Tomoe laughed an evil laugh, and deposited another rod of plutonium into the engine.
"NOW, WE ARE READY!" he shouted.
Even though unpracticed, Neo Queen Serenity was holding her own against Chaos.
"Even if this park falls, I will rebuild it!" Neo Queen Serenity responded, putting all her effort into destroying Chaos with the Ginzuishou.
"You are weak," Chaos responded, throwing her through a shop.
"Looks like we have to save the Queen," Jeruka responded, "Minions, take her away."
The Cosplayers descended en masse, and pushed her slowly away.
"You'll pay for this, whoever you are!" Neo Queen Serenity shouted as she was taken back to the castle.
"I've always wanted to do that," Jeruka responded.
"Fool," Chaos responded, "I can sense the Dark Kingdom Energy in you."
Chaos began to try to drain Jeruka, but Jeruka was too fast. He (she?) led Chaos through Crystal Tokyo, causing untold property damage.
"Man, they have *got* to stop playing with Chaos," TuxRainbow responded.
"I think you were correct in telling me to come, for I will beat Chaos," Saturn responded.
Saturn ran off, towards where Jeruka was leading Chaos.
"I guess we should go, we know what will happen next," Terra responded.
TuxRainbow nodded.
"I guess I will let you choose where we go next time," he added, as the two left for the past.
Jeruka led Chaos towards the real castle, where the cosplayers had Neo Queen Serenity pinned.
"Now, I will show you how to truly beat a monster," Jeruka responded, attacking.
Neo Queen Serenity snapped, as soon as she saw the destruction.
"Minako will leave me," She replied, "but not the others. I'll show them, I will show them all!"
Neo Queen Serenity escaped the castle, going towards the only place she could go to regain her power and her advantage: The Museum of Senshi History, where she left Galaxia's bracelets.
"I'll make them all call me queen," she intoned, laughing.
Meanwhile, the battle between Chaos and Jeruka seemed even, until Chaos began to drain energy from Jeruka.
"We won't be able to hold the fusion much longer," Jeruka responded.
"From Hell's heart I stab at thee, monster!" roared Saturn.
"She wouldn't' Jeruka responded, splitting back into Haruka and Jedite and getting out of the way.
Saturn Saturn responded.
Haruka Gulped.
"She would", Haruka responded.
"Kame...hameHaaaa!" Saturn shouted, pouring all her power into the attack.
Chaos was shocked by the force of the blast.
"No way, only Neo Queen Serenity is supposed to have such power!" Chaos shouted, shrinking to a more human form, "I need more time to think about the situation, but next time, the Queen in mine!"
Chaos left, but the damage was done.
"Good riddance," Jedite responded, as Yuuchiro appeared.
"I guess I missed some wild party," Yuuchiro responded.
"Lets blow this snowball stand before Neo Queen Serenity takes my Starseed," Minako responded.
"Close enough," Artemis responded, as the group headed out.
It was all here, all of the devices used by all the evil Sailor Moon had faced: Beryl's staff, a Dark Crystal Wedge, a Cardian, a Dream Mirror catcher, and locked in the most secure vault, Galaxia's arm bands.
"Leave it to Ami to make it hard to steal this stuff," Neo Queen Serenity responded, trying to take the bands.
She had no luck.
"Guess I do this the easy way," she stated, breaking the glass.
She knew that Ami would come first, and most likely, Makoto. She would use the bracelets to grab their star seeds, and then, Rei would follow. She would control them all, and force them to rebuild Crystal Tokyo. Then, they would serve her, as it was intended: Blindly.
"They will pay they will all pay" she stated, knowing that in a matter of hours, the Inner Senshi would be Animamates.
"I guess that's over with," Haruka responded.
"Not by a long shot," Jedite responded, "I've only just begun to torment Neo Queen Stupidity."
"I suggest we leave, now," Saturn responded.
"Why?" Haruka asked.
Saturn pointed at Sailor Jupiter.
"Makoto?" Haruka responded, "Whats wrong?"
"Our Queen would like a word with you," she replied.
"Look at her eyes, Haruka!" Jedite responded.
Haruka looked, and saw no pupils in her eyes, at was as if her soul had been taken.
Saturn got into the Ferrari.
"Let's get out of here!" Yuuchiro responded, as Jedite and Minako got in.
"Crap, crap, crap!" Haruka shouted, as she got into the car.
"We're all in," Artemis responded, "now, get us out of here!"
The Ferrari sped up, just beating Jupiter to the punch, and plowed through the other Aniamamate Senshi, before heading back to the past.
"Looks like I will have to fix the rules again," Neo Queen Serenity responded. "Setsuna? Where are you?"
Setsuna had been hiding since the bracelets were stolen, as still was not there or was she?
"SORRY, HARUKA," Tomoe responded, handing her back her Ferrari, "BUT I DONT WANT YOU MESSING UP TIME."
"Man, that would be so cool," Haruka responded, looking at the rubble.
"Your house?" Minako responded.
"Former house," Haruka responded, "Michiru went nuts, got her own organization and stole the house."
"I guess we live outside until we straighten this mess out" Artemis responded.
Nearby, Terra and TuxRainbow looked on.
"I guess we should be lucky," Terra responded.
"This is better than that Crystal Tokyo," TuxRainbow responded.
"Let's go home," Terra responded.
"If only they could," TuxRainbow remarked.