Only in America:
can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures.'
do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
the budgets for advertising non-essential items, like soft drinks, exceed the budgets of many third-world nations.
do people buy domestic brand tires, because they want to "buy American," and install them on their imported cars.
is the least useful profession (professional athletes) paid such a disproportionate amount more compared to people with normal jobs.
are there drive-through banks, pharmacies, and liquor stores.
are parking lots (car parks) larger than the buildings they serve.
do people buy sugar-frosted honey-coated deep-fat-fried cheese sticks - and a Diet Coke.
do bumper stickers that say "Honk if you hate noise pollution".
People who argue that human life is so sacred that abortion justifies capital punishment.
A country where "evil-doer" and "do-gooder" are both negative characterizations.
"In God We Trust" written on every piece of money of a nation that alleges to separate church and state.
"The Land of the Free" with the world's second highest incarceration rate.