Suburban Senshi IRC Chat #663: “ Tales from the Future! To the year 3004!! ”
#663: “Tales from the Future! To the year 3004!!”

*** Now talking in #suburbansenshi
[10:46] * changes topic to `continued from last time`
[10:48] <> It is the year 9000
[10:48] <Sailor Pluto> The android will not be allowed to leave this place! CHRONOS TYPHOON!
[10:51] <Sailor Galaxy V> Heh, if it isn't Meioh Akemi... trying to pick on poor r-chan... what would your grandmother say? VENUS CHRONOS SHOCK!!
[10:52] * The golden Venus Chronos Shock cross-annihilates with the blood-red Chronos Typhoon
[10:52] <Sailor Pluto> What?! Impossible! Your powers of Venus hold no sway over Time!
[10:53] <Sailor Galaxy V> Heh, sorry to break your little panopoly, but Time isn't your exclusive provenance any more!
[10:54] <sailor> "monopoly"
[10:54] <Sailor Galaxy V> Hmm, yes, that too I guess.
[10:54] <Sailor Pluto> Abomination! I will destroy you!! I will--
[10:55] * sailor walks over to Sailor Pluto and puts her hand on her head, holding her at bay easily as Pluto struggles to swing her tiny key-staff at her
[10:56] <Sailor Galaxy V> Y'know, for a chibi, you sure have an anger management problem.
[10:57] * Sailor Pluto is three feet tall, is not actually the "real" Pluto, but the next Pluto-in-training with delusions of competence
[10:57] * Sailor Pluto is foaming at the mouth
[10:58] <Sailor Pluto> Why the hell are you here, anyway?! You're only a half-senshi, and that android is an illegal construct as per the decree of Serenity VI!!
[10:59] <Sailor Galaxy V> The fuku says otherwise, kiddo, and as for r-chan, Serenity V could never get over the fact r-chan beat her at three dimensional chess! But that's not a big deal because I could too, and I DID! WAI!! ♡
[11:00] * sailor notes Sakura Aino is an interesting mix of her parents' personae
[11:01] <Sailor Pluto> And what's the big deal with "sailor"!? She STOLE the Mars crystal and integrated it into her circuitry!!
[11:01] * sailor frowns and punts Sailor Pluto into orbit
[11:01] * sailor detransforms
[11:01] * sailor is now known as 3.14
[11:02] * Sailor Galaxy V is now known as S.X. Aino
[11:02] <S.X. Aino> Heh, I'm glad she wasn't the Butlerians
[11:03] <sailor> i could defeat them
[11:04] <S.X. Aino> I *know* and the problem is you'd *have* to, and if you did, history would get totally screwed up if you did that. Humanity is about to rebel against the machines and enter the age of the mind-computer, the mentat.
[11:04] < 3.14> you are human sakura
[11:04] <S.X. Aino> I'm more than just human ^_~
[11:05] <S.X. Aino> So we have to get you out of here, the others are waiting anyway.
[11:08] <S.X. Aino> But before we go, maybe you can finish up your story? ^_^ ♡
[11:08] * 3.14 chuckles
[11:10] <S.X. Aino> You were up to when Jeddy and Hotaru-P and Serenity III all got into the cryostasis chamber and decided to sneak their way into the 30th century in order to get Serenity II jealous enough to break up with her husband King Endymion
[11:11] * 3.14 nods
[11:52] * 3.14 changes topic to `the 30th century`
[11:53] * the cryopod opens
[11:55] * FireFly_9 blinks slowly
[11:56] <FireFly_9> ugh
[11:56] * // J_Daito // leaps out of the pod
[11:56] <FireFly_9> Well you're.... certainly chipper....
[11:56] <// J_Daito //> I'm used to long naps :P
[11:56] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> fick... wat hat mai hed...
[11:57] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> /mi crawlz ot of da pid
[11:57] * FireFly_9 gets out of the pod slowly
[11:57] <FireFly_9> This is... your lair in the 30th century?
[11:58] * FireFly_9 looks around and sees the same old subbasement, but filled with cutting-edge tech from 2004.
[11:59] <// J_Daito //> Yes.
[11:59] <FireFly_9> And our house is above this? Where are you?
[12:00] * Future Jedite appears with a swoosh of his cape
[12:00] <// J_Daito //> Heh
[12:00] <Future Jedite > heh
[12:01] * FireFly_9 is stunned by the presence of Future Jedite. He is grizzled, and wears a dingy, battered version of his PGSM uniform
[12:01] <Future Jedite > Welcome to the home of the Resistance
[12:02] * Future Jedite starts as he sees Chibiusa
[12:02] <Future Jedite > BLAST IT! You've brought HER here!
[12:02] <// J_Daito //> What, don't you remember?
[12:02] <Future Jedite > She's part of the Royal Family!
[12:03] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> sew... finali i knoe were u rasitence biches lav, ur azzes are ded mohshshshshsh
[12:03] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> /mi wips out har duel ginzousoes an prapraes to viporize futar geydite
[12:04] <// J_Daito //> No Spore, if you do that your mother will know you're here!
[12:04] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> fack!
[12:04] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> /mi pints 2 futrar geydite "ur az is min bich"
[12:04] <Future Jedite > Dammit! I'll end the pink menace here and--- (falls over as Past Jedite punches him out)
[12:05] <// J_Daito //> Whatever, idiot. Stupid wannabe revolutionary. I'm never going to turn into that bleeding-heart freak
[12:06] * FireFly_9 looks at Future Jedite and feels something odd in her stomach. Like gas.
[12:08] * // J_Daito // opens the hatch that leads to Tomoe's lab, which was over his lair
[12:08] <// J_Daito //> What the hell?
[12:08] * // J_Daito // sees a dank, dark lair filled with computer equiptment
[12:09] <FireFly_9> What is it
[12:09] <// J_Daito //> This... isn't your father's 30th century lab!
[12:09] <FireFly_9> He lives to this time period?!
[12:10] <// J_Daito //> Well he is fused with the alien Germatoid
[12:10] <// J_Daito //> But this thing looks like something out of a comic book
[12:10] <The Catman> Jedite....
[12:11] <// J_Daito //> The HELL?!
[12:11] <FireFly_9> Artemis!? The future... has changed?
[12:11] <The Catman> Welcome... to the Cat-cave
[12:11] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> _;
[12:12] <The Catman> The cat-computer alarm reminded me today would be the day you would launch your plot against Neo-Queen Serenity
[12:13] <FireFly_9> Artemis... you're still the Catman?!
[12:13] * The Catman looks fearsome in his cape and cowl
[12:13] <The Catman> Obviously.
[12:13] <FireFly_9> You... do know that Minako-sempai is actually alive, yes?
[12:14] <The Catman> Of course I do. I learned that hundreds of years ago. But I had become a force for fighting evil-- the cause of Great JusticeTM cried out for a hero.
[12:15] <// J_Daito //> This from the cat who called a pair of rollerskates the "catmobile"
[12:16] <The Catman> *Two Pairs* and I got better. (points to the Catmobile, which is a shiny, sleek futuristic black car studded with white neon lights)
[12:16] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> hloy sit... hoe cum i nevar hard of u?
[12:17] <The Catman> I was born out of the psychological trauma of a PGSM spoiler while you were still banished to the past. The future changed without you.
[12:17] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> U meen mai wurld is dafrent??
[12:19] <The Catman> Yes. Not so much that you wouldn't recognize it, but there are elements that are new.
[12:20] <// J_Daito //> Blah, I have no time to waste with this wannabe superhero
[12:20] <The Catman> Defeat still stings after 1000 years, eh, Jed?
[12:20] <// J_Daito //> Why you-- (launches himself at the catman)
[12:21] * The Catman blocks Jedite with his gauntlet covered left foreleg and shoves him back
[12:21] <The Catman> The Catman has powered body armor now
[12:21] <// J_Daito //> Blasted fur coat with legs!
[12:22] <The Catman> heh
[12:23] <The Catman> Jed, we can stand here all day trading barbs, or we can get to work on the master plan.
[12:23] <// J_Daito //> We?!
[12:24] <The Catman> I have no love for the reign of Neo-Queen Serenity, even if it is merely confined to the walls of the amusement park that has become Crystal Tokyo
[12:25] * The Catman is referring to the revelations of the unfinished Suburban Senshi Episode 20, which will now be spoiled because history's changing anyway and it's obsoleted heh
[12:28] <FireFly_9> If I recall correctly from my last visit here, which preceded you and Minako-sempai's walking out on NQS, there was a treaty established with the world government which allowed the senshi to remain sovereign in Crystal Tokyo, but nowhere else. The city became a self-contained world designed to keep Usagi-san convinced she was world leader, a job she barely paid attention to anyway.
[12:29] <The Catman> Precisely. She was so lazy and obsessed with her "man" that she rarely bothered to pay attention to what was going on outside the palace walls. As you know, the other senshi, when they weren't tending to her every whim, raised money to keep Crystal Tokyo going by trading off their fame and running the outer grounds as a Theme Park.
[12:31] <FireFly_9> But when I was last here, Jedite and Haruka-poppa came tearing through with Papa's Time Machine and basically destroyed the palace and ended Crystal Tokyo, causing the other senshi to move into Neo-Tokyo 3 in violation of the Metahuman Confinement Treaty...
[12:32] <The Catman> That never happened, because Small Lady here remembered it and warned her mother, who managed to reinforce the palace at the last minute
[12:32] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> datz rite biches
[12:33] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> bat sis gat mai men mamo-chun an i went har taken DEWWN
[12:33] <FireFly_9> Chibiusa, he's your FATHER.
[12:36] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> nit anymroe, remanbar wat i dad??
[12:37] <FireFly_9> You tricked Haruka-poppa into adopting you, so that Mamoru wouldn't legally be your father and so it ostensibly wouldn't be incest, but it WOULD be because he is still biologically your father.
[12:37] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> fack dat sit, hez nit mai father in da eyez of da lew!!1
[12:37] <// J_Daito //> So then you're not royalty then.
[12:37] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> ETF? peopel dnt car if im a batstard!
[12:38] <// J_Daito //> And you ARE a ba[BLEEP]rd, no question. But we need you for the plan
[12:39] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> newey, new it al cums togather
[12:40] <FireFly_9> geh
[12:40] <The Catman> You'll need my help if you want to get into the palace grounds
[12:41] <// J_Daito //> We don't need to get on the grounds... isn't this house within the Crystal Tokyo zone anyway?
[12:42] <The Catman> history changed... this house, along with Tsukino House, are preserved as historical museums. They're crawling with guards.
[12:42] <// J_Daito //> Guards?! What fear has a Dark General of Guards?
[12:42] <The Catman> _; True.
[12:43] <// J_Daito //> We just need Neo-Queen Stupidity to see me as Tuxy glomping the Chibi and the seeds will be sown.
[12:43] <The Catman> It's not that easy-- if you do that--
[12:43] <// J_Daito //> Silence, you costumed freak
[12:44] * // J_Daito // BUSTS through the ceiling of the cat-cave and enters the old Ten'ou / Aino house livingroom
[12:44] * Guards immediately rush in as Hotaru, Catman and Chibiusa crawl up into the livingroom behind Jedite
[12:45] * // J_Daito // raises his left hand and SUCKS the energy out of all the guards, who collapse
[12:46] * // J_Daito // is now known as Tux. Jedite
[12:46] <Tux. Jedite> Heh, shall we go outside and introduce our love to the world, Spore?
[12:49] <The Catman> I'm telling you, don't--
[12:50] * Tux. Jedite leads the Spore outside, stands by a stoplight so the traffic cams will see him, and proceeds to french the Spore
[12:50] <FireFly_9> Disgusting!
[12:51] <The Catman> FOOL! (launches a catarang into the air and hauls himself and Hotaru up to a rooftop)
[12:51] <FireFly_9> Artemis, why...
[12:51] * The sky turns totally BLACK
[12:51] <Tux. Jedite> ?
[12:52] * The voice of Neo Queen Serenity can be heard booming in the air
[12:54] <// J_Daito //> Sailor---
[12:54] <.`~SugaBB_2999~`.> --aminanate--
[12:54] <FireFly_9> --senshi?!
[12:55] * Sailor Mars, Jupiter and Mercury appear, gold bracelets on their wrists, an evil look in their eyes, they surround Jedite and Chibiusa
[12:55] <FireFly_9> What the--
[12:56] <The Catman> After Mina and I left following your visit, Serenity went insane with paranoia and used some of Galaxia's technology to take the Sailor Crystals of the remaining inner Senshi.
[12:57] <FireFly_9> Where are myself and the other outer Senshi in this time period, anyhow? I know we chose to stay in the past, but surely we lived to this time period anyway...
[12:57] <The Catman> Your futures... are not for me to reveal.
[12:57] <FireFly_9> So... the inner senshi... are Usagi-san's battle thralls?
[12:58] <The Catman> Yes... as Jedite and Chibiusa are about to find out.
[12:58] * 3.14 changes topic to `The present time (the year 9000) `
[12:59] <S.X. Aino> Ooh, I always love this part!! No one ever expects the Sailor Animamate Senshi!!
[12:59] < 3.14> heh
[12:59] <S.X. Aino> r-chan, can you make me some food, I'm STAAAAAAARVING!!
[13:00] * 3.14 chuckles "even worse than your mother"
[13:00] <S.X. Aino> hee hee!
[13:00] <S.X. Aino> Well I've heard it said a highly complex brain needs many more nutrients to function properly, so... ^_^
[13:01] < 3.14> your metabolism
[13:01] < 3.14> weapon of mass digestion
[13:02] < 3.14> is horrifying
[13:02] * S.X. Aino giggles
[13:02] * 3.14 starts cooking
[10:48] <> To Be Continued
*** Disconnected