#2080 “Fresh Starts”
[ FRI JAN 20 10:33 2017 TRANSCRIPT STARTED - TENOU HOUSE -
[ TOMOE HOTARU is sitting on a couch, drinking wine heavily ]
TEN'OU HARUKA: Whoa, 'Taru, I didn't know you drank
[ TOMOE HOTARU is rocking back and forth, her arms wrapped around her knees ]
TOMOE HOTARU: This is all your fault, Jedite!
[ TOMOE HOTARU points to AMERICA ]
JEDITE: Now now, Tomoe the Younger, this isn't one of *my* plots.
JEDITE: I would have come up with something cleverer, more insidious.
[ TOMOE HOTARU just chugs from the bottle ]
TEN'OU HARUKA: Erm, you know, for one thing you don't drink, and for another you're tiny and frail. I think your blood will be pure alcohol in a matter of minutes.
TOMOE HOTARU: You mean like yours?
TEN'OU HARUKA: Hey I have developed an IMMUNITY over long years
PROF. SOUICHI TOMOE: IN OTHER WORDS HER LIVER JUST GAVE UP TRYING AND IT JUST PASSES RIGHT THROUGH HER BODY! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!
DR. MIMI HANYU: I don't think that's how the body works, dear~
PROF. SOUICHI TOMOE: YOU'LL HAVE TO GIVE ME A REFRESHER COURSE, SWEETHEART~
[ TOMOE HOTARU goes green, either from the thought of that 'refresher course' or the booze and projectile vomits all over Jedite ]
JEDITE: .... This suit costs more than Ten'ou's car
KAIOH MICHIRU: It cost more than Haruka's car because that car cost Haruka nothing, as I paid for it :P
TOMOE HOTARU: I can't even make comments about the eschaton, I'm so tired. That bloated orange Cheeto is taking over America.
TOMOE HOTARU: It's like a Pinky and the Brain plot come to fruition.
TOMOE HOTARU: Only there's no brain and just Dr. Evil's implied Pinky.
TEN'OU HARUKA: Don't worry Hotaru-chan it will get better
TOMOE HOTARU: how?
TEN'OU HARUKA: if there's a global thermonuclear war, we'll survive. Along with the C[BLEEP]kroaches and Chibiusa.
TSUKINO 'CHIBIUSA' USAGI: hay y r u lamping mi in wit da cickroacahz
TEN'OU HARUKA: You ever looked at yourself in the mirror, sprout?
[ TSUKINO 'CHIBIUSA' USAGI leaps up and starts to bite at Haruka's neck ]
TEN'OU HARUKA: OH GOD VAMPIRE! VAMPIRE!
[ TEN'OU HARUKA flails, screaming "get her off!" ]
TOMOE HOTARU: for that you'd need a mandroid and we're fresh out
[ FRI JAN 20 2017 - TRANSCRIPT END ]
<GERMATOID> I BELIEVE HAMA CHISAKI USES A SLOW DIGESTIVE SYSTEM, LIKE A BOA CONSTRICTOR OR OTHER LIZARD CREATURE! I'LL BET THEY WISH THEY *WERE* DEAD THOUGH! MUAHAHAHAHAHAAH!