Suburban Senshi IRC Chat #1578 - “Whatever Happened to the Suburban Senshi? Part V”
IRC Chat #1578

“Whatever Happened to the Suburban Senshi? Part V”

Tags: Oh snap


TRANSCRIPT OF GINGA TELEVISION OFFICES SECURITY CAM RECORDER, DECEMBER 12TH, 2009


AYA: Ara!

KARASUMA: Aya, someone's broken into the building.

AYA: I know... that wave... do you feel it?

KARASUMA: Yeah. It feels like Galaxia. But different.

UNKNOWN: There you two motherBLEEPing cBLEEPt bBLEEPches are!

AYA: Ara! Such Language!

UNKNOWN: Seriously, you two miniscule sBLEEPts were the pride of the Animamates? fBLEEPk me!

KARASUMA: Who's talking?

AYA: Look down, it's the redheaded midget

UNKNOWN: FBLEEPK YOU YOU BRAINDEAD BLUE-HAIRED TITTY BAR WITH FEET I AIN'T NO GODDAMN MIDGET

AYA: ...

KARASUMA: Isn't that that kid who was tooling around with Tsukino Usagi back in 90's?

UNKNOWN: I'm no KID, birdlady! I'm CiCi, the BATTLE GODDESS OF THE EVERLOVING GALAXY

AYA: Chibi-Chibi... I think her name was...

UNKNOWN: fBLEEPk that Chibi-chibi bBLEEPllshBLEEPt! That cocBLEEPucking name followed me for over a THOUSAND FBLEEPING YEARS FBLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP

UNKNOWN: I'm TIRED OF BEING CALLED FBLEEPING SHORT

AYA: But you are short.

(TAPE DAMAGED HERE)


KARASUMA: So what, you decided to get revenge by taking out the senshi of the past to make it easier to stop the Imperial Navy of the 31st Century?

CICI: And it's worked perfectly, sBLEEPt for brains. Except for that massive fBLEEPkup in Costa Rica, all the inner senshi and Neptune are down, their sailor essences separated from their mortal bodies, and servin' me!

AYA: So why are you here at Ginga! And does that mean you hurt our boss?!

CICI: *I'M* YOUR BOSS, DITZY MCTALKSALOT! I'M THE CORE OF THAT HIPPIE PEACENICK EMBARASSMENT THAT CALLS HERSELF GALAXIA NOW. I'M THE WARRIOR SPIRIT THAT SEALED MOTHERBLEEPING CHAOS AND FORMED THE LIGHT OF HOPE THAT THAT DITZ TSUKINO BROKE! AND NOW I'M BACK TO MAKE YOU MY MINIONS!

KARASUMA: Hah, like a little runt like you could pull that sBLEEPt off. Aya, Transform.

AYA: Hai!

CICI: LOL you STUPID BITCHES. Now you gonna DIE.

(AUDIO OVERLOAD)

LEAD CROW: ... was that it?

CICI: WHAT THE FBLEEPK?

ALUM. SIREN: Ara, your gauntlet things didn't work...

CICI: BUT I SHOT YOU BITCHES CLEAN THOUGH

CICI: WHY AREN'T YOU SPLITTING INTO YOUR CIVILIAN SELVES

LEAD CROW: Because, little miss chain-smoker Napoleon of the future wannabe, when Galaxia found us all those years ago, she forced us to awaken as Sailor Senshi, and from that moment we never dropped the transformation.

ALUM. SIREN: That day, the "Dirty Pair" died... Kei and Yuri were gone forever...

LEAD CROW: Eventually our senshi selves took over fully. We CAN'T TRANSFORM BACK YOU MORON.

CICI: ....But that means

LEAD CROW: Yeah. it means now we're going to kick your ass.

CICI: fBLEEPknuggets plan C

ALUM. SIREN: WATCH OUT MALLET FROM HAMMERSPA--

ALUM. SIREN: OOF!

LEAD CROW: UGH!

CICI: HAHAHA YOU ARE DEFEATED I HAVE DEFEATED YOU

MEIOH SETSUNA: It's a good thing I was able to get you this mallet in time, Lord Mistress CiCi.

CICI: You have done well, my Emo Apprentice. You're well on your way to earning a new Sailor Crystal of your very own to replace the Pluto Planet Power that was so carelessly taken from you.

MEIOH SETSUNA: I live to serve, my liege.

CICI: But we gotta move fast, that goddamn Unazuki's been beaming messages back into the past to find Tsukino Usagi. We need to find her first before she whips out her crystal and really fBLEEPks us over.

MEIOH SETSUNA: You don't need to worry about her, my Lord Mistress.

CICI: ...huh?

MEIOH SETSUNA: After the last time she used the Ginzusihou to stop the mad rampage of her husband who was trying to prove his manliness by subjugating all the senshi, it broke and it is regrowing very, very slowly. She's got no power. I know *exactly* where she is right now.

CICI: Tell me moar...
END TRANSCRIPT OF GINGA TELEVISION OFFICES SECURITY CAM RECORDER, DECEMBER 12TH, 2009


next time, for the first time in seven years... Suburban Senshi reveals the TRUE FATE of Tsukino Usagi!




 






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