Suburban Senshi IRC Chat #1454 - “2 girls 1 movie: Twilight”
IRC Chat #1454

“2 girls 1 movie: Twilight”

Tags: what, wtf, vampires, mary sue, emo, 2 girls 1 movie

[00:04] *** Sun Nov 30 2008 - LOGGING START ***
[00:04] *** Topic is - oh my god it's the bottom of the barrel -
[00:04] *** Set by @Sakura Xadium Aino on Sun Nov 30 00:04 2008

[00:05] <@SpeedRcrX> Over the years we've seen our share of crappy s[BLEEP]t.
[00:05] <@SpeedRcrX> Movies we heard were bad and so had no choice to review, just to see how bad it was.
[00:05] <@SpeedRcrX> But then came a movie SO BAD, even we, the awesome Suburban Senshi couldn't handle the pain
[00:07] <GERMATOID> CLEVERLY WE DECIDED TO LET ALL THE VISITORS IN OUR HOUSE TEAM UP AND HANDLE THE "VAMPIRE ACTION" MOVIE TWILIGHT BASED ON THE SERIES OF MARY SUE FICS PUBLISHED WORKS BY STEPHANIE MEYER
[00:08] <[gTV]C'est_la_V> It's a review feature we call "2 girls, 1 Movie* * and three guys, but they don't count!!
[00:09] <@SpeedRcrX> You're gonna get basically a running commentary of their off-the cuff reactions to this movie, which I say, without hyperbole, is the worst piece of s[BLEEP]t of all time. MANOS the hands of FATE is better than this bulls[BLEEP]t
[00:09] <@SpeedRcrX> So here's the log...
[00:09] <@SpeedRcrX> and if you're thinking of paying to see this movie... don't just don't.
[00:10] <@SpeedRcrX> F[BLEEP]k don't even rent it unless you can con some idiot to rent it for you
[00:10] <@SpeedRcrX> It's THAT BAD.
[00:10] <@SpeedRcrX> We swear.





2 girls one movie*
* And three guys, but they don't count
REVIEW: TWILIGHT




[00:50] <writerstarcat> And now the happy dance may commence, my download is -- wait the download is of twilight
[00:50] * writerstarcat wipes away a single tear instead
[00:50] <writerstarcat> Anyways it's done.
[00:51] <writerstarcat> so whenever the godawful viewing should start I'm up for it as long as it's not like five tomorrow morning.
[00:51] <@Xadium> uhh see if the others are around
[00:53] * @Darkness falls in through the roof
[00:53] * @Xadium catches D
[00:54] <Matsumi Kaze> whoa!
[00:55] <writerstarcat> I know Yai just wanted to watch us watching it.
[00:55] <@Xadium> yai likes to watch
[00:56] * @Darkness eyebrow waggles?
[00:56] <writerstarcat> some guys do!
[00:59] <@Xadium> dp we watch or wait for tomorrow since half the guys are gone
[01:00] <writerstarcat> hmm.
[01:01] <writerstarcat> Is it really the kind of movie you'd be willing to watch twice?
[01:01] <writerstarcat> I mean, I know Shinji is, but he's a crazy mofo.
[01:01] <@Xadium> i couldn't handle it twice.
[01:01] <@Xadium> not unless it was REALLY bad.
[01:01] <@Xadium> to make up for the chick flickery
[01:02] <writerstarcat> Hey hey I like chick flicks, this is...not.
[01:02] <writerstarcat> this is a Bad Movie, which is a genre all on its own
[01:02] <@Xadium> yes of course you like chick flicks
[01:02] <@Xadium> I have no tolerance for that kind of s[BLEEP]t
[01:02] <writerstarcat> :< but but You've Got Mail!
[01:03] <writerstarcat> Come on!
[01:03] * @Xadium vomits in a bucket
[01:07] * writerstarcat queues up the movie
[01:09] <@Xadium> i am ready
[01:09] <@Darkness> I am unfortunately ready
[01:10] <Oronde> ready for what x?
[01:10] <@Darkness> AND SO THE NIGHT BEGINS
[01:10] <@Darkness> ...
[01:10] <@Yaijinden> They're watching a copy of Twilight they got from the Bittorrent store.
[01:10] <starcat> I am ready and waiting for THE SPARKLES
[01:10] * @Darkness says nothing.
[01:11] <@Xadium> starcat start the countdown
[01:11] <@Yaijinden> FIRE IT UP
[01:11] <starcat> 5!
[01:11] <starcat> 4!
[01:11] <starcat> 3!
[01:11] <starcat> 2!
[01:11] <starcat> 1!
[01:11] <starcat> go!
[01:11] <Oronde> spamming :P
[01:11] * @Darkness takes DEEEEEEEP breath
[01:11] <@Yaijinden> Legitimate spams.
[01:11] <@Xadium> why am i looking at an animal's butt
[01:12] <Crwn_FruT_Gamer> I LOVE THIS MOVIE
[01:12] <starcat> 20bux it's vampire-view
[01:12] <@Xadium> this is so boring
[01:12] <@Darkness> this is already a bad movie
[01:13] <@Xadium> i dont; want to hear bella talk any more
[01:13] <starcat> did she say Wisconsin
[01:13] <@Xadium> hsHOW CAN YOU F[BLEEP]K UP A VOICE OVER
[01:13] <starcat> THIS IS HOW
[01:13] <@Xadium> HOW CAN YOU MAKE IT SO MONOTONE
[01:14] <starcat> "Your hair's longer." "Cut it since the last time I saw you." "Oh. ...Guess it grew out again."
[01:14] <starcat> I don't think I like Bella.
[01:14] <@Xadium> she looks like the bored people i hated in HS
[01:14] <@Yaijinden> Nobody likes Bella.
[01:14] <starcat> her? bored? are you kidding?
[01:14] <@Darkness> ... I WAS the bored people in high school man
[01:15] * starcat was bored for totally different reasons from neesan
[01:15] <@Xadium> well the not nice bored people :P
[01:15] * starcat brought her own entertainment to school >_>
[01:15] <starcat> books and DS and duct tape
[01:15] <@Xadium> aww a cripple
[01:15] <@Xadium> and a native american
[01:15] <starcat> hey look, it's multicultural
[01:15] <@Xadium> ticking all the demographic boxes
[01:16] <starcat> Oh my gosh! It's a crappy truck!
[01:16] <starcat> Did he SERIOUSLY just say "you're the bomb"
[01:16] <@Darkness> we're five minutes into the movie and I'm already bored out of my mind.
[01:16] <@Xadium> me too
[01:17] <Matsumi Kaze> run for the exits?
[01:17] <starcat> it could get better
[01:17] <starcat> we haven't met Edward
[01:17] <Matsumi Kaze> from the sound of it....HOW did this become populer??
[01:17] <starcat> Creepy kid preying on new girls.
[01:17] <@Xadium> I don't know
[01:17] <@Xadium> GOD I NEED AN EXPLOSION OR ZOMBIES OR KENPACHI ZARAKI RIGHT NOW
[01:18] <starcat> This is REALLY boring.
[01:18] <@Xadium> that guy looks like young mr data
[01:18] <starcat> I don't want to relive high school.
[01:18] <starcat> High school was boring.
[01:18] <@Xadium> oh GOD SO VACUOUS
[01:19] <@Darkness> Okay did any of us really talk like this in highschool
[01:19] <starcat> Oh god Mary Sue.
[01:19] <@Xadium> no.
[01:19] <starcat> Why is everyone hitting on such a BORING person.
[01:19] <@Darkness> or act
[01:19] <@Darkness> or or... live like this
[01:19] <starcat> NEWS FLASH no one really likes the new girls like this
[01:19] <@Xadium> SHE IS ALL TEETH
[01:19] <@Xadium> ALL TEETH MAN THAT'S ALL I SEE
[01:20] <@Darkness> are they talking about the size of the swim team's c[BLEEP]ks.
[01:20] <starcat> This is so EXPOSITION-Y.
[01:20] <starcat> Ew.
[01:20] <@Xadium> oh god i hate this movie
[01:20] <@Xadium> SO MUCH
[01:20] <@Darkness> AND ENTER FERGIE- wait
[01:20] <@Xadium> SHOW NOT TELL ASSWIPES
[01:20] <@Xadium> I NEVER REALLY UNDERSTOOD THE VALUE OF THAT TILL NOW
[01:21] <starcat> He's just...not t"otally gorgeous"
[01:21] <@Xadium> LOL A GOTH CLOWN
[01:21] <starcat> oh god so glad i did not pay
[01:21] <@Xadium> with a SQUARE JAW
[01:21] <@Darkness> Guys need to learn how NOT to use eyeliner.
[01:21] <starcat> had I I would have seriously asked for my money back
[01:21] <starcat> Slow-mo!
[01:21] <@Xadium> LOL AIR EFFECTS
[01:21] <@Darkness> with a FAN no less.
[01:21] <starcat> At least they explained the Mysterious Breeze with that handy fan in the background
[01:21] <@Xadium> so horrible
[01:22] <@Xadium> here have this vodka
[01:22] <starcat> This music is crap too.
[01:22] <@Xadium> eww it smells
[01:22] <starcat> can i have some vodka
[01:22] <@Xadium> he's just LEERING
[01:22] <@Darkness> and so a science room romance begins.
[01:23] <@Xadium> AWW HE HAS TO STAY IN BIOLOGY
[01:23] <starcat> can i at least have my own planaria
[01:23] <@Xadium> it would be Bio.
[01:23] <starcat> "gorgeous"
[01:23] <@Xadium> lol the mary sueing
[01:23] <starcat> lol shadows
[01:23] <@Xadium> she's so GORGEOUS
[01:23] <@Darkness> I PLAYED SANTA THAT ONE YEAR
[01:23] <@Darkness> I'm sure I made an impression.
[01:23] <starcat> Every Thursday.
[01:23] <@Xadium> oh lord so glad i dfid not pay for this
[01:23] <@Darkness> I was the one who touched you inappropriately while you sat in my lap.
[01:24] <@Xadium> SO GLAD.
[01:24] <starcat> This is so...
[01:24] <@Xadium> why the f[BLEEP]k is it SO BORING
[01:24] <@Darkness> "Are they being nice to you?"
[01:24] <starcat> OH god no
[01:24] <starcat> NO DRAMA
[01:24] <@Xadium> you'd think vampires woukld be a little exciting
[01:24] <starcat> NO ANGST
[01:24] <starcat> MARY SUE IS GETTING EVERYTHING
[01:24] <starcat> WHY IS SHE WHINY
[01:25] <starcat> oh god nooooo don't confront him and demand to know what his problem is
[01:25] <@Xadium> I PLAN TO CONFRONT HIM AND DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT HIS PROBLEM IS
[01:25] <@Xadium> This is so ... STILTED
[01:25] <@Darkness> THE MUSIC WHY MUST IT SUCK
[01:25] <starcat> and whatever you do DON'T DO IT WITH A VOICEOVER
[01:25] <@Xadium> and the next day...! Another no show. ! More days passed.
[01:25] <@Xadium> Strange.
[01:25] <starcat> this is s[BLEEP]tty music and I am not even picky.
[01:26] <@Darkness> and suddenly
[01:26] <@Darkness> shakeycam?
[01:26] <starcat> the hell is going on
[01:26] <@Xadium> it's just banging your face on a synth keyboard
[01:26] <@Darkness> I think we missed something
[01:26] <starcat> half this movie is in shakeycam
[01:26] <starcat> oh I know
[01:26] <@Darkness> haha she fell over awkwardly
[01:26] <starcat> that's the non-veggie vampires attacking some dude
[01:27] <@Xadium> plot is begin
[01:27] <@Darkness> if this is supposed to make us feel for her it's not working.
[01:27] <starcat> Plot?
[01:27] <starcat> This isn't much plot.
[01:27] <Matsumi Kaze> so wait....now the plot begins???
[01:27] <@Xadium> thnaks for the tires
[01:27] <starcat> "thanks for the tires."
[01:27] <@Yaijinden> You have been DECEIVED.
[01:27] <@Darkness> 15 minutes in.
[01:27] <@Darkness> And we get something resembling plot happening.
[01:27] <starcat> are we done yet
[01:27] <@Xadium> CUT YOUR F[BLEEP]KING HAIR ASSWIPE
[01:27] <starcat> where are the sparkles
[01:27] <starcat> OH THERE'S THE SPARKLES
[01:27] <starcat> well a sparkle
[01:28] <starcat> SparkleymcSparklepants
[01:28] <@Xadium> s[BLEEP]t i missed it
[01:28] <@Darkness> emokid is back
[01:28] <@Xadium> is she PANTING
[01:28] <starcat> "You're Bella whatever?" "Yes."
[01:28] <@Darkness> THE GOLDEN ONION
[01:28] <starcat> What?
[01:28] <starcat> Oh god laughing at the bad reasons
[01:28] <@Xadium> god he is so oily.
[01:29] <starcat> Prophase.
[01:29] <@Darkness> Someone shoot me now.
[01:29] <starcat> Hey baby let's check out some asexual reproduction
[01:29] <@Darkness> Please.
[01:29] <@Xadium> he looks so,,,
[01:29] <@Darkness> Make it quick and painless.
[01:29] * @Xadium hugs darkness in pain
[01:29] <starcat> then maybe we can learn more about sexual reproduction after
[01:29] <starcat> "Any cold wet thing." (like your d[BLEEP]k.)
[01:30] <@Xadium> i dont' like this movie ><
[01:30] <starcat> Awww look at them all brainwavey on the anaphase.
[01:30] <@Xadium> it's like art school rejects trying to act
[01:30] <@Darkness> YOU'RE THE ONE WHO PICKED IT OUT XD
[01:30] <@Xadium> like they are reading off cue cards
[01:30] <starcat> isn't this...a bit PERSONAL after asking about the weather
[01:30] <@Xadium> yes i would have shut it off by now XD
[01:30] <starcat> thanks for the opportunity to not watch it by myself
[01:31] <@Xadium> my brain is bleeding
[01:31] <@Darkness> THANK YOU BOTH FOR MAKING ME WATCH THIS
[01:31] <@Darkness> REALLY.
[01:31] <@Darkness> y njy n
[01:31] <starcat> oh god how could Shinji go through this TWICE
[01:31] <@Xadium> NO ONE MADE YOU
[01:31] <starcat> WILLINGLY
[01:31] <@Xadium> YOU BANDWAGONED
[01:31] <starcat> AHAHAHA I forgot about the moodring eyes
[01:31] <starcat> "It's the flourescence"
[01:32] <starcat> "Your eyes were black." Like your soul. Also I was TOTALLY STARING AT THEM
[01:32] <@Xadium> STOP STARING GOD
[01:32] <starcat> like YOU STARE AT ME NOW
[01:32] <starcat> oh jesus christ this is bad
[01:32] <@Xadium> ooh.
[01:32] <starcat> also Superman Sparkles just saved her
[01:32] <@Xadium> that was at least a good special effect
[01:32] <@Xadium> YES ITS KAL EL
[01:32] <@Xadium> then the retarded music starts
[01:32] <starcat> "I'm so sorry, I panicked"
[01:32] <starcat> show some EMOTION you d[BLEEP]kwad
[01:33] <@Darkness> Ahh high school. So much fun. Smashing car doors and all.
[01:33] <starcat> "I'm sorry Bella, I tried to stop"
[01:33] <@Xadium> the doctr rlooks like a CORPSE
[01:33] <starcat> and the doctor is creepy
[01:33] <starcat> the DOCTOR is sexier than edward
[01:34] <@Xadium> UM SOH SORRI BELLAH
[01:34] <starcat> (The Doctor is pretty sexy right now though)
[01:34] <@Yaijinden> Oh, if it helps, every report I've seen says that the vampire actor guy hated the character with such a boundless, passionate hate that he channelled that hate into the whole of the character's personality.
[01:34] <@Darkness> (well compared to the REST of the cast)
[01:34] <starcat> HATE
[01:34] <starcat> So much hate
[01:34] <starcat> Thank God
[01:34] <starcat> and now sparkleyc[BLEEP]k is here
[01:34] <@Xadium> it's like a goth elvis impersonator
[01:35] <@Darkness> Are we actually going to watch the whole thing.
[01:35] <starcat> "No I wasn't. Believe me."
[01:35] <starcat> ...
[01:35] <starcat> I
[01:35] <@Yaijinden> Yes, because your suffering fuels my delight.
[01:35] <starcat> I have to see him sparkle.
[01:35] <starcat> Once he sparkles then we can stop.
[01:35] <@Yaijinden> DANCE PUPPETS
[01:35] <starcat> SHUT UP YAI
[01:35] * @Yaijinden makes puppetteery-finger wiggles
[01:35] <@Xadium> YOU CANT HANDLE TEH TRUTH
[01:35] <@Darkness> He can sparkle.
[01:35] <starcat> oh god "Well then I hope you enjoy disappointment"
[01:36] <@Xadium> what the
[01:36] <starcat> ...is she CRYING
[01:36] <@Xadium> DREAM RÆP
[01:36] <starcat> she DREAMED of him what.
[01:36] <@Darkness> I HOPE SO
[01:36] <Matsumi Kaze> ...I really don't get the vampire sparkles
[01:36] <Matsumi Kaze> I ask....WHY...
[01:36] <starcat> I AM NOT WEEPING
[01:36] <Matsumi Kaze> WHY
[01:36] <starcat> I am yelling
[01:36] <starcat> my stress explosion is ANGER
[01:37] <@Darkness> YOU'RE ALIVE while we're all dieing slowly.
[01:37] <@Xadium> no lamer boi go away
[01:37] <@Xadium> edward dresses so bad
[01:37] <starcat> ...wow she's a jerk. That guy was nervous about asking her to going to prom and she just blew him off
[01:37] <@Xadium> Dancing... ewww
[01:37] <starcat> Edward everything so bad
[01:38] <@Darkness> COMPOST IS COOL
[01:38] <@Xadium> Ewww
[01:38] <starcat> I laugh at the one-teacher high school.
[01:38] <starcat> (if another one shows up for anything more than a cameo I am going to laugh)
[01:38] <@Xadium> edwards looks like a young drugged out michael caine
[01:39] <@Yaijinden> Also, trivia: when Edward's actor was given an advance chapter of the fifth book of the series (which is actually the first, but from Edward's point of view), he deliberately leaked it to the fans.
[01:39] <starcat> YESSS
[01:39] <starcat> YES HE DID
[01:39] <@Xadium> lol i like the actor XD
[01:39] <starcat> I HEARD OF THAT
[01:39] <@Darkness> IT'S A WOOOOOOOOOOORM
[01:39] <starcat> This man is so awesome
[01:39] <@Xadium> i hate the role XD
[01:39] <@Yaijinden> Knowing what fits of apoplectic fury it would invoke in people.
[01:39] <starcat> Token Asian is going "hey look it's a worm huhuhuhuhuh"
[01:40] <@Xadium> apoplexy XD so awesome
[01:40] <@Xadium> TI IS NOT WORM IT IW WHITE MAN PENIS
[01:40] <starcat> That does not happen.
[01:40] <starcat> *bangs on the bus door* *it opens*
[01:40] <starcat> I have to wonder.
[01:40] <@Darkness> The bus is obviously a TARDIS
[01:40] <starcat> if I go get a drink, will I miss anything?
[01:40] <starcat> LET'S SEE brb
[01:40] <Furu> D: NO THE DANCE THE WORM
[01:41] <Matsumi Kaze> the bus is a TARDIS? Iris???
[01:41] <@Yaijinden> Also, othe trivia: when he was supposed to do a book signing, he deliberately blew the people off, and there was a miniature fangirl riot that ensued afterward.
[01:41] <@Xadium> "surf" the internet
[01:41] <@Xadium> lol
[01:41] <@Xadium> this movie is so f[BLEEP]king boring
[01:41] <starcat> oh god no
[01:42] <starcat> NO SELF-DEPRECATION
[01:42] <@Darkness> wake me up when there are sparkles.
[01:42] <@Xadium> we are THIRTY MINUTES IN
[01:42] <starcat> SELF-DEPRECATING MARY SUES ARE THE WORST
[01:42] <@Xadium> WAD IF IM DA BAD BUY
[01:42] <starcat> wait
[01:42] <starcat> "What if I'm the bad guy and not a super her---wait
[01:42] <starcat> what the hell
[01:42] <starcat> "I can see thati t's just a mask"
[01:42] <starcat> "I know your soul"
[01:42] <@Xadium> COME TO THE BEACH
[01:42] * @Darkness yawns
[01:42] <@Xadium> COME
[01:43] <@Darkness> CUM
[01:43] <Furu> If you insist :|
[01:43] * Furu is away: brb fap fap
[01:43] <@Darkness> ... WHAT NO
[01:43] <@Xadium> lol
[01:43] <starcat> god DAMMIT neesan
[01:43] <@Xadium> enjoy your sandwich D
[01:43] <starcat> no >:[
[01:43] <KnifeyUtensil> I'd think I'd rather wtach Jesus Christ Vampire slayer than watch Twilight
[01:43] * starcat smacks n eesan upside the head
[01:43] <starcat> also IIRC Jacob is a werewolf.
[01:44] <@Xadium> Dude JCVS was Funny
[01:44] <@Darkness> I DIDN'T MEAN TO
[01:44] <@Darkness> besides it's not like we have any libido LEFT
[01:44] <starcat> well we don't
[01:44] <starcat> he does
[01:44] <starcat> he's not watching
[01:44] <@Xadium> his teeth GLEAM
[01:44] <KnifeyUtensil> JCVS was ... special
[01:45] <starcat> Yai gets off on other people's suffering
[01:45] <starcat> also see? He's totally a werewolf
[01:45] <Furu> JCVS was bad on purpose though
[01:45] <starcat> Wow. This is the stupidest showdown ever.
[01:45] <Furu> That was the point
[01:45] <@Xadium> lol it;s ut aware mono
[01:45] <KnifeyUtensil> lol
[01:45] <starcat> Especially flashbacks.
[01:46] <starcat> oh snap it's a ladyvampire.
[01:46] <starcat> and a man.
[01:46] <starcat> a Naked Man.
[01:46] <@Xadium> i would have cut this off by now
[01:47] <starcat> did SHE JUST START TAKINGOFF HER CLOTHES
[01:47] <@Xadium> BLADE this is NOT.
[01:47] <starcat> TO KILL THAT GUY
[01:47] <@Xadium> killed him with her nudities.
[01:47] * starcat strips down naked
[01:48] <@Darkness> apparently vampires like to "play" with their food before eating.
[01:48] <Furu> ....
[01:48] <starcat> it can't get more humiliating than watchnig twilight in a public place
[01:48] * @Xadium averts his gaze geez
[01:48] * @Darkness joins in the nakedness.
[01:48] <starcat> Bella has all the answers.
[01:48] * Furu uses his hands to cover up Jalissa's naughty bits! D:...:D?...:D...:D
[01:48] * @Xadium drinks too. a LOT.
[01:48] <@Xadium> CLOTHES SHOPPING
[01:48] <@Darkness> and so we have a dress shopping scene
[01:48] <@Xadium> JESUS
[01:48] <starcat> ...
[01:49] * @Xadium bankgs ihuwefawefhuio;;awefhu;adfhuio;adfhuidfhuaefhuilo;efhuiagrho;agr;oh
[01:49] <starcat> I have no libido furu
[01:49] <starcat> i am watching other people shop for prom dresses
[01:49] <starcat> it is horribly boring
[01:49] <@Xadium> grhugrhuiagul;oau;goreu
[01:49] <Furu> D:
[01:49] <@Xadium> egruaigr;eu;aegr;oaregu;oareguhao;egrhuao;egrhu;aogruh;ogrua;eroghu;rg
[01:49] <@Darkness> X-chan stop that
[01:49] <Matsumi Kaze> what the..
[01:49] <starcat> why the hell would you buy a book like that
[01:49] <@Xadium> @_@
[01:49] * Furu sits in the corner
[01:49] <starcat> seriously, open the book, look up the story, read it
[01:49] <starcat> put it back on the shelf
[01:50] <starcat> oh noes it is an alley.
[01:50] <@Xadium> We';re NTO EVEN HALFWAY IN
[01:50] <@Xadium> WHERE YOU GOIN
[01:50] <starcat> STUNT DRIVER
[01:50] <starcat> he...shows up
[01:50] <starcat> in another town
[01:50] <starcat> ...
[01:50] <@Darkness> GET IN DA CHOPPA-- CAR.
[01:51] <@Xadium> LOL
[01:51] <@Xadium> for a moment i thought i heard blue man group
[01:51] <starcat> "We waited, but then we left."
[01:52] <@Xadium> VAMPIRE POWERS MAKE US STRONG
[01:52] <@Darkness> I sat through Manos. Twice. And I could not do it for this.
[01:52] <starcat> ...I want mushroom ravioli D:
[01:53] <starcat> "special diet."
[01:53] <@Darkness> cooking naked is dangerous, wear an apron.
[01:53] <starcat> ...
[01:53] <starcat> I'm not going to cook.
[01:53] <starcat> I can't not watch this.
[01:53] <@Xadium> god his conversation is like treally bad faux tarentino
[01:53] <starcat> It's the world's most boring train wreck.
[01:53] <starcat> "protective" is code for "Stalker"
[01:53] <@Xadium> he's feeling very protective
[01:54] <starcat> he reads minds AND sparkles
[01:54] <@Xadium> he moves hsi face away from the camera so he can emote
[01:54] <starcat> LOL
[01:54] <Furu> He moves his face away from the mic so he can breathe
[01:54] <@Darkness> ... since when did vampires READ MINDS
[01:54] <Matsumi Kaze> does any of this equal vampire??
[01:54] <@Darkness> Money sex money sex cat.
[01:54] <starcat> And in the audience -- boredom, terror, gibbering madness
[01:54] <@Darkness> sounds like my sister.
[01:55] <Furu> Twilight is the cinematic equivalent of Chocolate Rain
[01:55] <@Darkness> But anyways.
[01:55] <KnifeyUtensil> (( argh brb my computer is all fritzy annnddddd has no sound. ))
[01:55] <starcat> here the only talent is that the lead guy didn't snap halfway through and go "OH GOD NO VAMPIRES ARE THE WORST AAAAGHH"
[01:55] <@Darkness> OMG WE TOUCHED HANDS LOLZ
[01:55] <starcat> "Your hand is so cold."
[01:56] <starcat> ...yes. SOMETIMES PEOPLE HAVE COLD HANDS
[01:56] <starcat> I MEAN WOW COLD HANDS NO ONE BUT VAMPIRES HAVE THOSE
[01:56] <Furu> So is this worse than Manos
[01:56] <starcat> is that the same doctor as before?
[01:56] <@Xadium> HE REGENENERFATED
[01:56] <@Darkness> yes and yes
[01:57] * @Xadium steps away to get water
[01:57] <starcat> "I'm really sorry." in the most monotone bland emotionless voice ever.
[01:57] <starcat> Your friend of thirty years died but I'm really sorry.
[01:57] <starcat> Maybe.
[01:58] <@Darkness> "I want you to carry this with you" and I couldn't tell what it was because of this horrible lighting for the shot
[01:58] <@Darkness> it looked like a fork.
[01:58] <@Darkness> like one of those green kiddy forks.
[01:58] <starcat> Really?
[01:58] <starcat> I thought it looked like some weird bottle of something.
[01:58] * @Xadium shares pringles with D
[01:58] <starcat> Or!
[01:58] <Furu II> D:
[01:58] <starcat> I know!
[01:58] <starcat> One of those bingo stamper bottles!
[01:58] * @Darkness oms.
[01:58] <@Xadium> ... man this movie is like... i have never seen a movie this crap before.
[01:59] <@Xadium> that dismembnered guy
[01:59] <@Xadium> that is US
[01:59] <@Darkness> UNDEAD. SPEED. STRENGTH. SKINNED. IMMORTAL. DRANK BLOOD. SEXY VAMPIRE SHOT what.
[01:59] <starcat> isn't it nice, they're highlighting all the impotant words
[02:00] <@Xadium> duo> shaldra darkness can you tell me how to shot vampire
[02:00] <starcat> is he FOLLOWING HER?
[02:00] <@Xadium> yes
[02:00] <@Darkness> appropriately INTO THE CREEPY FOG-FILLED FOREST.
[02:00] <starcat> *MY* skin is pale white and ice cold
[02:01] <starcat> (at least, my hands are in the winter)
[02:01] <@Darkness> neechan's a vampire D:<
[02:01] <starcat> ask me how long I've been 17
[02:01] <@Xadium> A WHILE
[02:01] <starcat> (it was a while)
[02:01] <starcat> but then I got fixed
[02:01] <starcat> I do still have chibifangs though.
[02:01] * starcat points
[02:01] <@Darkness> Say it. Out loud. It turns me on.
[02:02] <starcat> 50 minutes in.
[02:02] <@Xadium> STALKER
[02:02] <starcat> FIFTY MINUTES
[02:02] <starcat> FIFTY F[BLEEP]KING MINUTES TO SAY THE WORD VAMPIRE
[02:02] <@Darkness> ... what's Furu doing with Fu over there.
[02:02] <starcat> "what do we eat"
[02:02] <@Xadium> and we are not HALF WAY YET PEOPLE
[02:02] <starcat> I don't...I don't know.
[02:02] <starcat> oh god
[02:02] <starcat> no
[02:02] <starcat> NO X
[02:02] <starcat> NOOO don't remind me
[02:02] <starcat> OH YES
[02:02] <starcat> "You need to see what I look like in the sunlight"
[02:02] <starcat> SUPAFAST PIGGYBAACK RIDE
[02:02] <@Darkness> Hey X-chan it's Inuyasha.
[02:03] <@Xadium> lol that piggyback lookes so lame
[02:03] * starcat watches eagerly
[02:03] <starcat> oh god the chimes
[02:03] <@Xadium> lol chimes
[02:03] <starcat> also the encode doesn't show it very well
[02:03] <@Xadium> DAMN THE CAM REMOVES THE SPARKLES
[02:03] <@Darkness> SPARKLES
[02:03] <@Xadium> lol they dropped glitter on him
[02:03] <@Darkness> spaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarkles.
[02:03] <starcat> I think it was just body glitter.
[02:04] <starcat> "I am sexy and you love it, but it's because I want to suck your blood."
[02:04] <@Xadium> AS IF YOU COULD OUTRUN ME
[02:04] <starcat> Wait.
[02:05] <@Xadium> KILL HER SOFTLY
[02:05] <starcat> "I've killed people before." "It doesn't matter." "I wanted to kill you. I've never wanted a human's blood so much un my whole life." "I trust you."
[02:05] <@Darkness> WITH YOUR SAW
[02:05] <starcat> "Don't." "I'm here, I trust you."
[02:05] <starcat> WHAT THE F[BLEEP]K IS WRONG WITH THIS.
[02:05] <starcat> Okay.
[02:05] <@Xadium> it;s DUMB is that's wrong
[02:05] <Matsumi Kaze> everything?
[02:05] <starcat> I'm beyond "argh bad movie" and into "okay this is creepy."
[02:05] <@Darkness> ... emovampire is on womandrugs.
[02:05] <@Darkness> APparently.
[02:05] <starcat> Really, really creepy.
[02:05] <@Xadium> Shaldra you are like my own persoanl brand of heroin
[02:06] <starcat> creepy.
[02:06] * starcat would be okay with not watching the rest
[02:06] * @Darkness smacks X-chan upside the head.
[02:06] <@Xadium> (who the f[BLEEP]k WRITES THIS)
[02:06] <starcat> (stephanie meyer)
[02:06] <Matsumi Kaze> someone with very little talent?
[02:06] * @Xadium busts out laughinfg for unknown reason
[02:06] <starcat> I CAN'T DO THIS FOR ANOTHER HOUR
[02:06] <starcat> Oh god they're TOUCHING
[02:07] <@Xadium> lol arthouse music
[02:07] <starcat> yeah when the lion falls in love with the lamb it's called CROSS-SPECIES BESTIALITIY
[02:07] <@Darkness> STUPID LAMB AND SICK MASOCHISTIC LION
[02:07] <@Xadium> arthouuse music for arty implied sex
[02:07] <starcat> a sick masochistic lamb is right
[02:07] <starcat> or was it lion?
[02:07] <starcat> i don't know
[02:07] <starcat> what the
[02:07] <starcat> wait
[02:07] <starcat> ...
[02:07] <starcat> Okay. Uh.
[02:07] <@Darkness> ....
[02:07] <starcat> ...
[02:07] <[gTV]C'est_la_V> haha Artemis never has sex implied or not
[02:07] <starcat> ...
[02:07] <starcat> ...
[02:07] <@Darkness> .......
[02:07] * [gTV]C'est_la_V is getting dizzy at the screeen
[02:08] <starcat> ...
[02:08] <starcat> Okay.
[02:08] <starcat> I've...really had enough.
[02:08] <@Xadium> XD
[02:08] <Furu> W---what happened?
[02:08] <starcat> I think I'm going to stop and then
[02:08] <starcat> There were three things I was positive: First, Edward was a vampire
[02:08] <starcat> (i mean come on seriously)
[02:08] <starcat> Anyways
[02:08] <@Xadium> there was a part of him. that thirsted for my blood.
[02:09] <starcat> Stop and start again when they get to it tomorrow
[02:09] * @Darkness is just sitting here slackjawed.
[02:09] <starcat> or whenever
[02:09] <Furu> Crawl into my arms so I can hold you and tell you things are all right?
[02:09] <@Xadium> what kid of that age says irrevocably
[02:09] <starcat> I can't do it man.
[02:09] <starcat> I do.
[02:09] <starcat> I did.
[02:09] <starcat> :|
[02:09] <@Xadium> OH. MY GAWD.
[02:09] * starcat has paused it.
[02:09] <@Darkness> LOOK AT HER BUTT
[02:09] * starcat just...yeah
[02:09] <@Xadium> okay yeah
[02:09] <@Darkness> IT'S SO BIG
[02:09] <starcat> it's so big
[02:09] <@Xadium> LOL
[02:09] <Matsumi Kaze> heh
[02:09] <@Darkness> okay now I have stopped this
[02:10] * starcat shudders
[02:10] <starcat> Shinji is a better man than I.
[02:10] <@Darkness> stopped it so quickly
[02:10] * @Xadium stops at 58:29
[02:10] <starcat> (it would make sense, I'm a woman)
[02:10] * starcat stopped at 57:49
[02:10] * @Darkness stopped at 58:20
[02:10] <starcat> I'm...
[02:10] <@Xadium> i'm broken man
[02:10] <Matsumi Kaze> anyone want an airsickness bag?
[02:10] <starcat> So so gloriously uncomfortable right now D:
[02:10] <@Xadium> broken.
[02:10] <starcat> No D:
[02:10] <@Darkness> shoot me. please.
[02:11] <starcat> this is beyond physical
[02:11] <@Xadium> lol why uncomfortable
[02:11] <starcat> this is the numbness of ohgod what.
[02:11] * Furu holds arms open? D:
[02:11] <starcat> Just...the creepy
[02:11] <@Xadium> ahaahah
[02:11] * @Xadium hugs shal for supoort
[02:11] <starcat> it went from "who the f[BLEEP]k are you" to "you're a vampire? AND you sparkle?! WELL SIGN ME UP I LOVE YOU."
[02:11] <KnifeyUtensil> I'll be sure to pass this information on to other people who want to see twilight~
[02:11] <@Darkness> shoot meeeeeeeeeeeeee
[02:11] <starcat> no touching
[02:11] * @Xadium cant' shoot you dear there's no power left in me
[02:12] <starcat> i don't want to be touched
[02:12] <starcat> i feel so unclean
[02:12] <Matsumi Kaze> I have a nerf gun
[02:12] <@Xadium> this was
[02:12] <starcat> bad things have happened to my soul
[02:12] <starcat> oh god shinji was right
[02:12] <@Xadium> the worst film ever
[02:12] <@Xadium> and
[02:12] <@Xadium> it aint over
[02:12] <Furu> ;_;
[02:12] <@Darkness> are we even going to do the other half
[02:12] * @Xadium is pale which for him is a feat
[02:12] <KnifeyUtensil> well.. it is possible to turn it into a drinking game?
[02:12] <@Xadium> love i dunno.
[02:12] <starcat> [15:26] <@Shinji Ikari> It's bad. [15:28] <@Shinji Ikari> I'm understating how bad it is. It's so bad that the only reason I wouldn't punch the guy who played Edward in the film and demand the money back that I didn't pay to see the film is the fact that, IRL, the guy has become totally Awesome.
[02:13] <starcat> No, knifey
[02:13] <starcat> because it's also boring
[02:13] <starcat> and nothing happens
[02:13] <@Darkness> IF WE DID THAT I WOULD BE SO WASTED RIGHT NOW I'D HAVE ALCOHOL POISONING.
[02:13] <starcat> darkness we will see tomorrow
[02:13] <starcat> how mike feels
[02:13] <@Xadium> no killing D XD
[02:13] <Matsumi Kaze> ...wonder what the sequal is going to be like
[02:13] <@Xadium> the sequek is them voiceovering for an hour
[02:13] <@Xadium> wait not that is this
[02:14] <@Xadium> i is the brked
[02:14] <starcat> [15:52] <@Shinji Ikari> The movie doesn't have a lot of plot. [15:53] <@Shinji Ikari> It just wanders aimlessly. [15:53] <Naocat> I think the shock of the sparkling vampires will make up for that [15:53] <@Shinji Ikari> BELLA GOES TO SCHOOL. BELLA GOES TO MORE SCHOOL. BELLA INTERACTS WITH HER DAD. BELLA DEALS WITH EDWARD. [15:54] <@Shinji Ikari> BELLA AND EDWARD INTERACT LIKE RETARDED HORNY MIDDLE SCHOOLERS.
[02:14] * @Xadium falls over and twitches
[02:14] <@Darkness> There's MORE!?
[02:14] * Matsumi Kaze offers X a ginger ale
[02:14] * @Darkness curls up in a little ball
[02:14] <starcat> five books
[02:14] <Furu> ._.
[02:14] <starcat> four out and one more on the way
[02:14] <starcat> (it's like children only worse)
[02:14] <@Xadium> andendlessseaof krap
[02:14] <starcat> also
[02:14] <starcat> oh god.
[02:14] * starcat shivers
[02:14] * starcat finds a blanekt and wraps up
[02:15] * @Xadium pisses off reibot so she will kill him
[02:15] <@spiritflame> sorry just crawl off and die
[02:15] <starcat> no x
[02:15] <starcat> that is not the answer
[02:16] * @Xadium crawls off to die
[02:17] * @Darkness punches herself in the face
[02:17] * @Darkness is now known as Shaldra Darkness
[02:17] <@Shaldra Darkness> @_@
[02:17] * @Shaldra Darkness is away: @_@
[02:17] <starcat> there is no more hope in the world.
[02:17] <starcat> when that movie sets records...
[02:17] <starcat> THAT movie...
[02:17] <@Xadium> wait it what
[02:18] <@Xadium> record for what most rotten tomato ever
[02:18] <starcat> it set records
[02:18] * @Xadium is away: can't handle this
[02:18] <starcat> highest gross for a female director on opening day or something
[02:18] <Furu> That;s thankfully a really lame record
[02:19] <starcat> ...
[02:19] <starcat> I just got back from a midnight premiere, and the movie blew me away. I'm an avid book lover and college lit major and VERY hard to impress as far as book to screen adaptations go. I have NO complaints! (Take that mom and best friend!) Kristen and Rob are the perfect Edward and Bella. They were captivating from start to finish. I sat back in my seat and listened to my whole theater erupt in laughs, gasps, sighs and jumps at all the right places.
[02:19] <starcat> Granted most of us in there were young women, but the movie just plain rocked that way. It sucks you in and tells the story just right. Even my friend who hadn't read the books was just as enthralled as the majority of us fan girls.
[02:19] <Furu> COLLEGE
[02:19] <Furu> LIT
[02:19] <Furu> MAJOR
[02:19] <starcat> The humor was Twilight's greatest asset. The baseball game was amazing and the mirror fight scene was tense. I enjoyed the music, the non-overdone visual effects, the adherence to all major plot points and characters and the ending. The ending was pretty much the best. I walked out really salivating to see the next 3 on screen, just like that.
[02:19] <starcat> and the BEST PART:
[02:19] <starcat> If you give Twilight a shot, you shouldn't be disappointed. It's that good.
[02:20] <starcat> oh god
[02:20] <starcat> shoot me
[02:20] <Furu> At what, Stupid Bimbo B[BLEEP]ch University?
[02:20] <starcat> smite me
[02:20] <Furu> GOOOOOOOOO AIRHEADS!
[02:20] <starcat> i need to die
[02:20] <@Xadium> erll of course the ENDING WAS THE BEST
[02:20] <@Xadium> BECAUSE IT WAS OVER
[02:20] <@Shaldra Darkness> IT WAS THE END
[02:20] * @Xadium is away: T_T
[02:21] * @Shaldra Darkness is away: haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalp
[02:21] <starcat> I am D:
[02:21] <starcat> the FAQs on imdb
[02:21] <Adair> O_o
[02:21] <starcat> Does Bella ingest the venom when she kisses Edward? EditHistoryDelete Stephenie Meyer has clearly stated that the venom has no effect on the human body unless it gets into the bloodstream. Bella (Kristen Stewart) and Edward's kisses are fairly chaste; they do not "French" kiss. Edward is extremely careful not to cut Bella with his incredibly sharp teeth or the venom would get into her bloodstream.
[02:21] <@Shaldra Darkness> you.
[02:21] <@Shaldra Darkness> did you like Twilight.
[02:21] <@Shaldra Darkness> did you
[02:21] <@Shaldra Darkness> answer me
[02:21] <starcat> What happens when Bella gets her period? This has been addressed by Stephenie Meyer. She states that this is "dead blood" and isn't as potent to Edward, though it is a bit uncomfortable for him. He's too much of a gentleman to say anything about it, and she's too embarrassed to ask about it.
[02:22] <starcat> ...
[02:22] <starcat> Top 5 Contributors: TwilightMind, Solymar25, EdwardBitesMyPillows, sheambulance, rshna85
[02:22] * Matsumi Kaze sips ginger ale
[02:22] <@Xadium> F[BLEEP]K MAN
[02:22] <starcat> "EdwardBitesMyPillows."
[02:22] <@Xadium> ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
[02:22] <starcat> I am D: ing so hard right now
[02:22] <@Shaldra Darkness> THE HELL
[02:22] <starcat> EDWARDBITESMYPILLOWS
[02:22] <@Xadium> .away GOD
[02:22] <Furu> Tee Ehm Eye
[02:22] * @Xadium punches himself int he face till he drops
[02:22] <starcat> I have to laugh or else i am going to cry
[02:25] <starcat> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAGHAHHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
[02:25] <starcat> oh god
[02:25] <starcat> The script was finished in 6 weeks.
[02:25] <starcat> does this surprise ANYONE
[02:26] <@Shaldra Darkness> i dun wanna watch the rest of the movie
[02:26] <@Shaldra Darkness> do we haveta
[02:26] <@Xadium> no
[02:27] <starcat> here we go:
[02:27] <@Xadium> but it's up to mikey
[02:27] <starcat> With a .6 mil debut gross, the movie had the top debut ever for a film directed by one woman (as of 2008).
[02:27] <@Xadium> lol because usually movies are directed by 2 ewomen
[02:27] <@Shaldra Darkness> and one cup
[02:27] <@Xadium> E.women
[02:27] <@Wolfwood> Who do I go see to beat the crap out of to get those wasted moments of my life back?
[02:27] <@Shaldra Darkness> I HAD TO I AM SORRY
[02:27] <starcat> <_<
[02:27] <starcat> shaldra are you feeling better
[02:27] <@Xadium> shaldra you are my e.woman
[02:28] <@Wolfwood> I'm watching it right now out of sheer boredom.
[02:28] <starcat> wolf what did YOU waste it on
[02:28] <starcat> twilight?
[02:28] <starcat> twilighti is not the cure for boredom
[02:28] <starcat> it is the cause
[02:28] <@Xadium> what rhe f[BLEEP]k wolf you fool NO
[02:28] <@Wolfwood> yes unfortunetly.
[02:28] <starcat> NO
[02:28] <starcat> Don't do it man.
[02:28] <@Xadium> you will not live
[02:28] <starcat> I'm serious.
[02:28] <starcat> It's f[BLEEP]king creepy and boring at the same time
[02:28] <starcat> Don't
[02:28] <starcat> When I tell you don't you don't
[02:28] <starcat> it's THAT BAD
[02:29] <@Wolfwood> This.....
[02:29] <@Wolfwood> This makes House of the Dead watchable.
[02:29] <starcat> I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO IT
[02:29] <starcat> i will have only the socially-accepted minimum of sympathy for you after this.
[02:30] <@Xadium> just as i have declared versus (or possibly azumi) as the best movie wever made
[02:30] <@Xadium> i decalre twilight the WORST movie ever.
[02:31] <@Wolfwood> This is anthrax in film form
[02:31] <@Xadium> how far did you get wolf
[02:31] <@Wolfwood> ten minutes
[02:31] <@Xadium> i cannot laugh
[02:31] <@Xadium> i wanted to die 10 mins in too
[02:32] <@Wolfwood> I found rum, it's the only way I made it past five.
[02:32] <@Shaldra Darkness> I MADE IT ABOUT AN HOUR IN AND DID NOT DRINK
[02:32] <@Shaldra Darkness> ....
[02:32] <starcat> I have just wasted nearly an hour of my life on that.
[02:33] <@Shaldra Darkness> WHY DIDN'T I DRINK
[02:33] <@Shaldra Darkness> WHERE IS MY SAKE
[02:33] <@Shaldra Darkness> SAKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
[02:33] <@Shaldra Darkness> EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE


[18:11] * @Michael Dembeck is away: gettting something
[18:11] * @Michael Dembeck is back
[18:11] * @Michael Dembeck is wearing a t-shirt reading "The Goth Kids were right"
[18:12] <writerstarcat> I...I am sad. My favorite aunt is reading Twilight and she likes it.
[18:12] <writerstarcat> Her friend took her daughter to the movie and loved it.
[18:12] <@Darkness> nooooooooooooo D:
[18:12] <writerstarcat> everything is ruined forever. :(
[18:13] <@Michael Dembeck> ya know, after this
[18:14] * @Xadium comes ina nd passes out m&m's peanut butter cups, choco shakes and pringle s toveryone
[18:14] <@Xadium> I have snacked up for this shiznit.
[18:16] <@Xadium> Ahh how fast i skipped forward through the movie to the point we left off , I wish i could have skipped forward like this last night
[18:19] <writerstarcat> (we suffer for other's enjoyment I HOPE YOU LIKE SCHADENFREUDE WHEN I AM KICKING YOU IN THE SENSITIVE BITS, DEAR READER)
[18:21] <@Michael Dembeck> SKY
[18:21] <@Michael Dembeck> LOTS OF SKY
[18:22] <@Dr. Xadium> DOES A PERSON HAVE TO BE DYING
[18:22] <@Michael Dembeck> TO WATCH THIS MOVIE, YES
[18:22] <@Darkness> "what was it like" Sexy.
[18:22] <@Xadium> It's trying to turn all of us
[18:22] <@Darkness> did we just watch Yaoi.
[18:22] <writerstarcat> ahahaha brb
[18:22] <@Xadium> A frenzy begins you can't stop
[18:23] <@Michael Dembeck> a frenzy, up the butt, amirite
[18:23] <@Darkness> I JUST DISCOVERED WHY SO MANY FANGIRLS LIKE THIS MOVIE.
[18:23] <@Xadium> I don't... want.. to be a monster...
[18:23] <@Darkness> IT'S THE YAOI FANGIRLS
[18:23] <writerstarcat> why doesn't PETA complain
[18:23] <writerstarcat> I mean they're drinking blood of animals
[18:23] <writerstarcat> that's cruel
[18:24] <@Michael Dembeck> "It's just me"
[18:24] <@Michael Dembeck> ok
[18:24] <@Darkness> The ones I encountered in the manga section and they went "do you like yaoi SQUEEE"
[18:24] <writerstarcat> D:
[18:24] <@Darkness> unfortunately true story.
[18:24] <@Xadium> LOL only he can read minds
[18:24] <@Michael Dembeck> he is a MUTANT SPARKLING VAMPIRE
[18:24] <@Darkness> Sigh.
[18:24] <@Darkness> "Could you ACT... human."
[18:25] <@Xadium> SINISTER NATIVE MAN
[18:26] <@Darkness> remember. All native americans are werewolves.
[18:26] <@Michael Dembeck> and this must be a first
[18:26] <@Michael Dembeck> a wheelchair bound werewolf
[18:26] <writerstarcat> Next time I go to the casino I'll be sure to keep my silver in the car.
[18:26] <@Michael Dembeck> LOOK AT HIM WHEEL AFTER HIS PREY
[18:26] <@Xadium> reminds me of the werewolf movie with emilio estevez' brother
[18:27] <@Darkness> "Its so light and open, you know" he obviously LIKES to sparkle.
[18:27] <@Xadium> aww she thought. no BDSM
[18:27] <writerstarcat> sparklesparklesparkle
[18:27] <writerstarcat> why are they watching a cooking show
[18:27] <@Michael Dembeck> ok, the non food eating vampires are cooking
[18:27] <writerstarcat> ...i mean seriously
[18:27] <@Darkness> IS SHE EVEN ITALIAN
[18:27] <@Xadium> because the tension is SIMMERING
[18:28] <@Michael Dembeck> really, i have a urge to scream out
[18:28] <writerstarcat> SHE SOUNDS SO SINCERE
[18:28] <writerstarcat> "I would never tell anybody anything."
[18:28] <@Michael Dembeck> DIE MONSTER, YOU DON'T BELONG IN THIS WORLD
[18:28] <@Xadium> lol the blonde looks like a pissed off christina applegate
[18:29] <writerstarcat> "You do smell good."
[18:29] <writerstarcat> Lesbian vampire
[18:29] <@Darkness> "Oh you do smell good"
[18:29] <@Xadium> YUO DO SMELL GOOD
[18:29] <@Xadium> that guy looks like the joker.
[18:29] <@Darkness> VEGETARIAN VAMPIRES
[18:29] <writerstarcat> He's like a freaking puppy
[18:29] <writerstarcat> "You won't hurt her." "You won't pee on the carpet."
[18:30] <@Xadium> Somewhere, Alucard is crying.
[18:30] <writerstarcat> That's the neatest messy I have ever seen.
[18:30] <writerstarcat> "No bed?" "Uh, no, I don't sleep. I AM A VAMPIRE"
[18:30] <@Darkness> "I don't sleep" ^__~
[18:30] <writerstarcat> *om nom nom delicious bellablood*
[18:30] <@Shinji Ikari> DAMMIT YOU STARTED ALREADY
[18:31] <@Michael Dembeck> This movie makes a great case for why the Belmonts hunted vampires
[18:31] <@Shinji Ikari> Ba[BLEEP]rds!
[18:31] <writerstarcat> they're in his bedroom
[18:31] <writerstarcat> having decidedly unsexy times
[18:33] <@Shinji Ikari> I'll say it...
[18:33] <@Darkness> ....
[18:33] <@Shinji Ikari> I'd tap it if she wasn't so retarded and accident-prone like in the novels.
[18:33] <@Xadium> are they dancing or awkwardly tryign to walk past each other
[18:33] <@Michael Dembeck> it looks more like failed dry humping then dancing to me
[18:33] <@Xadium> HE FLEW ON A FART
[18:33] <@Shinji Ikari> HOLD ON TIGHT SPIDER MONKEY
[18:33] <@Michael Dembeck> WIRE FU
[18:34] <@Shinji Ikari> Christ what a stupid remark
[18:34] <@Xadium> SUPER GOTH
[18:34] <@Darkness> so
[18:34] <@Xadium> moneky clinging like in old kung fu movies
[18:34] <@Darkness> I'm trying to figure out DON'T CALL THEM GOTHS D:<
[18:34] <@Darkness> THEY ARE NOT GOTHS D:<
[18:34] <@Xadium> SORRY XD
[18:34] <@Darkness> HOW DARE YOU CALL A VAMPIRE A GOTH D:<
[18:34] <@Shinji Ikari> IT DOES IN MY WORLD
[18:35] <@Darkness> now then I'm trying to figure out how to make a drinking game
[18:35] <@Xadium> FALLOUT OF THE TREE COME ON
[18:35] <@Darkness> out of this movie
[18:35] <writerstarcat> They're up in a tree?
[18:35] <@Xadium> FALLL
[18:35] <writerstarcat> neesan -- every time a v/o starts, drink
[18:35] <@Darkness> and my problem right now
[18:35] <@Darkness> is I will ether get wasted
[18:35] <@Shinji Ikari> HIS BEAUTIFUL VAMPIRE BOY POWERS WON'T ALLOW HIM
[18:35] <@Darkness> or not drink ANYTHING.
[18:35] <writerstarcat> hmmm.
[18:35] <@Shinji Ikari> God that boy is one 109 year old repressed Vampire Virgin
[18:35] <@Xadium> WHY IS THE ROOM DARK AND YET WE CAN SEE
[18:35] <@Shinji Ikari> (Yes he really is)
[18:35] <writerstarcat> impossible
[18:35] <writerstarcat> I know!
[18:35] <@Michael Dembeck> apparently being a vampire means you can play a mean piano
[18:35] <writerstarcat> Drink every time Edward and Bella stare at each other.
[18:36] <@Shinji Ikari> Oh man
[18:36] <@Darkness> I can do that one!
[18:36] <@Xadium> lol good one star
[18:36] <@Shinji Ikari> Because you guys can't see it due to the quality here
[18:36] <@Shinji Ikari> There's some guys in the trees
[18:36] <@Shinji Ikari> Watching
[18:36] <@Shinji Ikari> VAMPIRES
[18:36] * @Darkness pours a cup and waits.
[18:36] <writerstarcat> Yeah, the sparkling was pretty impossible too, shinji
[18:36] <@Shinji Ikari> YEAH I DON'T LIKE IT EITHER
[18:36] <writerstarcat> :(
[18:36] <writerstarcat> also
[18:36] <writerstarcat> THAT CHICK
[18:36] <writerstarcat> AT THE BAR
[18:36] <@Shinji Ikari> I'll admit it...
[18:36] <writerstarcat> THAT'S THE GODDAMNED WRITER
[18:36] <writerstarcat> F[BLEEP]K HER
[18:36] <writerstarcat> FUUUCK HEEEER
[18:36] <@Shinji Ikari> That whole 'I don't like it' line actually got some laughs in the theater
[18:36] <writerstarcat> with a KNIFE
[18:36] <@Michael Dembeck> oh lord
[18:37] <@Michael Dembeck> earlier
[18:37] <@Shinji Ikari> Hell, *I* laughed at it
[18:37] <@Michael Dembeck> "You're all grown up, and gorgeous:
[18:37] <@Shinji Ikari> Due to how f[BLEEP]king stupid those two kids are together
[18:37] <@Shinji Ikari> well one kid and a creepy pedo 109 year old virgin vampire
[18:38] <@Michael Dembeck> hell, wolf boy will go on to wanna f[BLEEP]k there kid
[18:38] <@Michael Dembeck> HA HA, Spoilers
[18:38] <@Shinji Ikari> yes mike!
[18:38] <@Shinji Ikari> SPOIL IT
[18:38] <@Michael Dembeck> *their kid, too
[18:38] <@Xadium> eww ahahah
[18:38] <writerstarcat> "Yes. My guy is a vampire."
[18:38] <writerstarcat> and
[18:38] <writerstarcat> He's IN HER ROOM WHAT
[18:38] <@Shinji Ikari> HE'S A STALKER THAT'S WHAT
[18:38] <writerstarcat> WHAT THE F[BLEEP]K JESUS CHRIST
[18:38] <writerstarcat> GET IN THE CAR BELLA
[18:39] <@Shinji Ikari> HEY MOM I'M DATING A STALKER
[18:39] <writerstarcat> RUN
[18:39] <writerstarcat> RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
[18:39] <writerstarcat> ...
[18:39] <@Xadium> that is MEGA creepy
[18:39] * @Darkness swigs back a cup of sake
[18:39] <@Shinji Ikari> THERE HE GOES ADMITTING IT
[18:39] <writerstarcat> JUST THE PAST COUPLE OF MONTHS?!
[18:39] <@Shinji Ikari> WATCHING HER SLEEP
[18:39] <@Shinji Ikari> FOR MONTHS
[18:39] <writerstarcat> D:
[18:39] <writerstarcat> Oh jesus i need a hug
[18:39] <writerstarcat> i need many hugs
[18:39] <writerstarcat> i need to just
[18:39] * @Darkness hugs neechan D:
[18:39] * @Shinji Ikari hugs
[18:39] <writerstarcat> oh god
[18:39] <@Shinji Ikari> don't move says the pedo vampire to the stupid jailbait
[18:39] <@Michael Dembeck> ...
[18:39] <@Xadium> UGGHHHHHHH
[18:39] <@Michael Dembeck> KISS ALREADY
[18:40] * @Michael Dembeck looks at his watch
[18:40] <@Michael Dembeck> ONE MINTUE?!?
[18:40] <@Shinji Ikari> if they actually make more of these...
[18:40] <writerstarcat> Okay this is uncomfortable
[18:40] <@Michael Dembeck> it took them 60 seconds to finally kiss
[18:40] <@Shinji Ikari> XD Shal
[18:40] <@Xadium> thank god for blurry cam quality
[18:40] <@Shinji Ikari> THREE MOAR MOVIES UNTIL PEDO GETS HIS TARGET
[18:40] <@Shinji Ikari> Yeah you missed seeing her underwear
[18:40] <writerstarcat> He's just admitted to stalking her and then they kiss
[18:40] <@Shinji Ikari> ...yes I remember that detail
[18:40] <writerstarcat> ...
[18:41] <writerstarcat> I don't know.
[18:41] <@Xadium> she likes being hunted?
[18:41] <@Shinji Ikari> She's a stupid b[BLEEP]ch? YES
[18:41] <@Xadium> aww they "sleep" together.
[18:41] <@Xadium> literally.
[18:41] * @Darkness pulls out the rest of the sake cups and pours up shots for the house.
[18:41] <Oronde> hmms
[18:41] <@Xadium> how cute.
[18:41] <writerstarcat> waah...
[18:41] <@Michael Dembeck> oh lord, just put an arm around her already
[18:41] <@Shinji Ikari> no cold hard sparkling d[BLEEP]k for you yet!
[18:41] <writerstarcat> Hey wait
[18:41] <@Xadium> I can see why the preteens are melting all over this
[18:41] <writerstarcat> He's in her room
[18:42] <@Darkness> BEER AND GUNS
[18:42] <@Michael Dembeck> NICE SHOTGUN CLEANING SHOT
[18:42] <writerstarcat> "Edward doesn't live. In town."
[18:42] <@Michael Dembeck> did we just shift to Alabama. now?
[18:42] <@Shinji Ikari> Because preteens aren't known for their astounding tastes
[18:42] <@Xadium> BRING HIM IN he says as he c[BLEEP]ks his gun
[18:42] <writerstarcat> Right outside because he SLEPT IN HER ROOM ONLY HE DOESN'T SLEEP
[18:42] <writerstarcat> SO oh god
[18:42] <@Xadium> I like this guy
[18:42] <writerstarcat> that's so f[BLEEP]king creepy
[18:42] <writerstarcat> Go Dad.
[18:42] <@Darkness> shoot him Dad shoot him
[18:42] <@Xadium> Kirk> SHOOT HIM
[18:42] <@Michael Dembeck> "Hey Edward.....i'm gonna shot ya in the ass with a shotgun"
[18:43] <@Shinji Ikari> PEPPER SPRAY
[18:43] <@Michael Dembeck> and lol, thunderstorm baseball
[18:43] <writerstarcat> this is
[18:43] <writerstarcat> THIS is the baseball scene.
[18:43] <writerstarcat> ...
[18:43] <@Shinji Ikari> VAMPIRE BASEBALL
[18:43] <@Shinji Ikari> YES
[18:44] <@Darkness> SUPAH BASEBALL
[18:44] <@Michael Dembeck> .... the f[BLEEP]k is this s[BLEEP]t
[18:44] <@Michael Dembeck> this is like watching one of those bullls[BLEEP]t games in the X-men comics where they call "no powers" and use them anyway
[18:45] <@Shinji Ikari> Man this is like a s[BLEEP]tty version of how the X-Men used to play Baseball at the Xavier Institute
[18:45] <@Shinji Ikari> YES MIKE YOU GOT IT
[18:45] <writerstarcat> This is just bulls[BLEEP]t
[18:45] <@Shinji Ikari> SAME BRAINWAVES
[18:45] <@Xadium> SURPRISE YAOI JUMP
[18:45] <@Darkness> So. Now then. It's not gods bowling. It's vampires playing baseball.
[18:45] <@Michael Dembeck> BRAINWAVES
[18:45] <writerstarcat> too much f[BLEEP]king slowmo
[18:45] <@Xadium> symmetrical catch yaoi docking
[18:45] <writerstarcat> How the hell do the bats and such not break
[18:45] <@Shinji Ikari> Christ this cliche techno music
[18:45] <@Michael Dembeck> DUN DUN DUUUUUUUN
[18:45] <@Darkness> They bit them before playing.
[18:45] <@Shinji Ikari> XD
[18:45] <writerstarcat> lol
[18:45] <writerstarcat> This is really quite an awful soundtrack
[18:46] <@Shinji Ikari> It is
[18:46] <@Shinji Ikari> Fitting for such an awful film
[18:46] <writerstarcat> are those werewolves
[18:46] <@Xadium> lol it's highlander 5 all over again
[18:46] <@Shinji Ikari> Now we start heading towards the climax!
[18:46] <@Shinji Ikari> No vampires
[18:46] <writerstarcat> No
[18:46] <writerstarcat> They're vampires
[18:46] <@Darkness> NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
[18:46] <@Darkness> NO X NOOOOOOOOOO
[18:46] <@Michael Dembeck> now it's like a vampire version of west side story
[18:46] <writerstarcat> and doucheier looking ones than these
[18:46] <@Shinji Ikari> THAT'S WHAT I JUST SAID!
[18:46] <writerstarcat> climax?
[18:46] <writerstarcat> ...
[18:46] <writerstarcat> are
[18:47] <@Michael Dembeck> JAMAICAN VAMPIRE
[18:47] <@Xadium> SNAP YOUR FINGER AND DANCE
[18:47] <writerstarcat> are they going to *play baseball to death*
[18:47] <@Shinji Ikari> I wish they would've
[18:47] <@Shinji Ikari> It could've been so much moar awesome
[18:47] <writerstarcat> oh.
[18:47] <writerstarcat> damn.
[18:47] <@Darkness> ....
[18:47] <@Shinji Ikari> Vampires beating each other to death with baseball bats
[18:47] * @Darkness downs another sake shot.
[18:48] <@Michael Dembeck> ...eww
[18:48] <writerstarcat> no
[18:48] <@Michael Dembeck> that wasn't a sexy innuendo at all
[18:48] <writerstarcat> I was thinking "playing baseball against each other"
[18:48] <writerstarcat> "forever"
[18:48] <@Xadium> lol this gay dance movement
[18:48] <@Michael Dembeck> NOW it's west side story
[18:48] <writerstarcat> Why are they crouched like that.
[18:48] <@Michael Dembeck> When you're a jet, you're a jet for life
[18:48] <writerstarcat> GUYS I FEEL THREATENED time to squat down and stick out my butt
[18:48] <@Shinji Ikari> Because it's a cliche thing to do
[18:49] <@Darkness> Now I'm going to be picky here
[18:49] <writerstarcat> I just met a girl named Bellria?
[18:49] <@Darkness> the crouched thing is meant for werewolves
[18:49] <@Shinji Ikari> It's like they've read one too many Wolverine comics and decided to mimic it without it being cool
[18:49] <writerstarcat> I know, right?
[18:49] <writerstarcat> Werewolves != vampires
[18:49] <@Darkness> vampires wouldn't a) freak out so readily, b) show that they're freaked out.
[18:49] <writerstarcat> then again
[18:49] <writerstarcat> vampires don't SPARKLE
[18:49] <@Shinji Ikari> MOST EXCITING GAME EVA
[18:49] <writerstarcat> You can't go home
[18:49] <writerstarcat> oops
[18:49] <writerstarcat> My bad
[18:49] <@Xadium> these are mopdern sensitive vampires for the wmo age
[18:50] <@Xadium> emo
[18:50] <@Shinji Ikari> for the laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame age
[18:50] <writerstarcat> this is...
[18:50] <@Michael Dembeck> really, i can't take these 'pires seriously
[18:50] <@Shinji Ikari> EDWARD LEAVE ME ALONE STOP FOLLOWING ME TO THE BATHROOM
[18:50] <writerstarcat> Yeah.
[18:50] <Matsumi Kaze> god...I hate sensitive vampires
[18:50] <@Xadium> lool he just STALKED HER AGAIN
[18:50] * @Darkness tosses the cup away and chugs straight from the jug.
[18:50] <writerstarcat> Edward what are you doing with my underwear
[18:50] * @Darkness shudders ahhhhhhhhhhh that's better.
[18:50] <@Shinji Ikari> NO EDWARD IT ISN'T SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE TO WATCH A GIRL USE THE BATHROOM IF YOU'RE NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH THEM
[18:51] <writerstarcat> Edward why are you rubbing it on your face
[18:51] <writerstarcat> Edward why are my bras full of bite marks
[18:51] <@Michael Dembeck> My vampires wear Victorian Era clothing, terrorize countryside, and get beaten by whip wielding muscular people
[18:51] <@Shinji Ikari> EDWARD STOP SNIFFING MY TAMPONS
[18:51] <@Darkness> Edward bites my pillows.
[18:51] <writerstarcat> Edward stop peeing in the corners this isn't your territory
[18:51] <writerstarcat> thank you neesan
[18:51] <@Shinji Ikari> Oh gawd
[18:51] <writerstarcat> i neded to remember that
[18:51] <@Shinji Ikari> That happens in the last novel
[18:51] <writerstarcat> ...
[18:51] <@Shinji Ikari> DURING THEIR FIRST BOUT OF SEX
[18:51] <@Darkness> what.
[18:51] <@Xadium> My vampires wear shadea and trenchoats and use swords an guns to kick ass
[18:51] <writerstarcat> you're f[BLEEP]king serious aren't you.
[18:51] <@Darkness> what.
[18:51] <@Darkness> what.
[18:51] <@Darkness> what.
[18:51] <@Shinji Ikari> IT DOES
[18:51] <@Darkness> what.
[18:51] <@Darkness> what.
[18:51] <@Shinji Ikari> I S[BLEEP]T YOU NOT
[18:51] <@Darkness> WHAT>
[18:51] <writerstarcat> ...
[18:51] <@Shinji Ikari> I AM NOT KIDDING
[18:51] <writerstarcat> oh god
[18:52] <@Xadium> OW.
[18:52] <writerstarcat> i want to stab myself.
[18:52] <writerstarcat> so hard.
[18:52] <@Shinji Ikari> ALSO THAT B[BLEEP]CH IS STONE COLD AND NOT IN A GOOD WAY
[18:52] <writerstarcat> this
[18:52] * @Darkness pushes her sharp objects FAR AWAY
[18:52] <writerstarcat> this is bad for me
[18:52] <@Shinji Ikari> NOR IN THE WAY EDWARD'S C[BLEEP]K IS STONE COLD
[18:52] <@Xadium> lol still 30 mins to go
[18:52] <writerstarcat> THANK YOU XADIUM
[18:52] <writerstarcat> THANK YOU
[18:52] <@Xadium> he just keeps SHOWING UP
[18:52] <writerstarcat> YOU HELP
[18:52] <writerstarcat> SO MUCH
[18:52] <writerstarcat> STOP HELPING
[18:52] <writerstarcat> stop helping
[18:52] * writerstarcat cries
[18:52] <@Darkness> YOU'RE THE ONE WHO WANTED TO WATCH IT NEECHAN
[18:52] <@Shinji Ikari> HAHAHAHAHA
[18:52] * @Darkness hugs crying neechan D:
[18:52] <writerstarcat> T_T
[18:53] <writerstarcat> i didn't know it was this bad
[18:53] <@Shinji Ikari> EMMIT
[18:53] <writerstarcat> i didn't knooow
[18:53] <@Shinji Ikari> EMMIT FOUGHT IN THE CIVIL WAR
[18:53] <@Darkness> It's okay neechan. It's okay.
[18:53] <@Shinji Ikari> AND NOT THE SUPERHERO ONE
[18:53] * @Darkness comforts.
[18:53] <@Xadium> he's got unparalleledl senses
[18:53] <writerstarcat> 300 years
[18:53] <@Xadium> how nice.
[18:54] <writerstarcat> of being the jamaican black dude
[18:54] <writerstarcat> (token black vampire?)
[18:54] <@Michael Dembeck> the rasta vampire says so, it must be true
[18:54] <@Shinji Ikari> WOLVERINE HAS THAT TOO BUT THE DIFFERENCE? WOLVERINE IS AWESOME
[18:54] <writerstarcat> (where's the asian and the latino)
[18:54] <writerstarcat> (we've got a wheelchair werewolf)
[18:54] <@Shinji Ikari> I will say this:
[18:54] <@Shinji Ikari> That one girl there?
[18:54] <@Shinji Ikari> The one with short hair.
[18:54] <@Shinji Ikari> I have heard actually Awesome Things about that character
[18:54] <writerstarcat> Alice?
[18:55] <@Shinji Ikari> But it doesn't equal to the S[BLEEP]ttiness of EVERYTHING ELSE
[18:55] <@Xadium> ohyeah?
[18:55] <@Darkness> Well considering the cast it's not HARD to stand above the rest.
[18:55] <@Michael Dembeck> She'd better
[18:55] <writerstarcat> clone, insert in other universe
[18:55] <@Michael Dembeck> she looks like a vampire version of Lady from DMC
[18:55] <writerstarcat> :3 problem solved
[18:55] <@Darkness> (also she's sort of hot in a punkgoth way)
[18:55] <@Shinji Ikari> I LIKE THE WAY YOU THINK KIDDO
[18:55] <@Darkness> (if she wasn't a vampire I'd hit it)
[18:56] <@Shinji Ikari> Oh gawd
[18:56] <@Michael Dembeck> examples are cool
[18:56] <@Xadium> ....
[18:56] <writerstarcat> ...rubbing against a tree to mark it
[18:56] <@Darkness> ...
[18:56] <@Shinji Ikari> Wanna know how cliche the blonde female vampire's story is?
[18:56] <writerstarcat> isn't that...a bit animal
[18:56] * @Xadium bangs his head on the desk
[18:56] <writerstarcat> no
[18:56] <writerstarcat> no i do not
[18:56] <@Shinji Ikari> She originally was dying after a gang rape back in the day before doctor vampire saved her
[18:56] <@Darkness> BUT BUT THEY'RE VAMPIRES NOT WEREWOLVES
[18:56] <writerstarcat> twenty-five minutes
[18:57] <writerstarcat> twenty-five minutes.
[18:57] <@Shinji Ikari> B[BLEEP]ch obviously never heard of the concept that rape doesn't equal character development
[18:57] <@Darkness> VAMPIRES NOT WEREWOLVES
[18:57] <@Darkness> VAMPIRES NOT WEREWOLVES
[18:57] <@Xadium> god these matrix moves are annoying
[18:57] <@Darkness> VAMPIRES NOT WEREWOLVES
[18:57] <writerstarcat> Alice has no emotion.
[18:57] <writerstarcat> I KNOW NEESAN drink every time a vampire acts like a werewolf
[18:57] * @Darkness CHUGS.
[18:57] <@Shinji Ikari> Oh that actor
[18:57] <writerstarcat> Alone.
[18:57] <writerstarcat> BUT NO SEX UNTIL THE FOURTH BOOK
[18:58] <@Shinji Ikari> HATE YOUR ROLE, SON
[18:58] <@Shinji Ikari> HATE IT WELL
[18:58] <writerstarcat> The actor is f[BLEEP]king awesome
[18:58] <writerstarcat> He deserves a medal
[18:58] <@Xadium> chug for every misuse of techno
[18:58] <writerstarcat> a f[BLEEP]king huge one
[18:58] <@Shinji Ikari> He does
[18:58] <writerstarcat> "I SURVIVED TWILIGHT AND PISSED OFF FANGIRLS SIMULTANEOUSLY"
[18:58] <writerstarcat> om nom nom mom :9
[18:58] <@Darkness> vampire acts like werewolf, misuse of techno, voiceover.
[18:59] <@Shinji Ikari> Especially with the unconfirmed action of him leaking that novel. The list of suspects is VERY small and he's the most obvious choice
[18:59] * @Darkness will publish this drinking game.
[18:59] <@Xadium> maybe add bad matrix movies
[18:59] <@Xadium> moves
[18:59] <writerstarcat> moves
[18:59] <@Xadium> and voiceovers
[18:59] <writerstarcat> and bella/edward staring
[18:59] <@Xadium> and STILTED PROSE
[18:59] <writerstarcat> voiceovers is on there
[18:59] <writerstarcat> no no stilted prose
[18:59] * Hooded_Figure drinks her tea
[18:59] <@Xadium> lol mace
[18:59] <writerstarcat> we'd get sued for alcohol poisoning
[19:00] <@Shinji Ikari> I wish I had someone here that I could awkwardly stare at
[19:00] * writerstarcat wishes she had tea
[19:00] * writerstarcat stares awkwardly at shinji
[19:00] * @Shinji Ikari stares awkwardly back at the Kiddo
[19:00] <@Shinji Ikari> MIRRORS
[19:00] <writerstarcat> ...
[19:00] <@Xadium> lol it's game of death
[19:00] <@Xadium> where's bruce lee
[19:01] <writerstarcat> unlike edward I WILL bite >:[
[19:01] <@Shinji Ikari> he's off on the moon
[19:01] <@Shinji Ikari> with dracula
[19:01] <writerstarcat> >:E
[19:01] <@Shinji Ikari> >:3
[19:01] <writerstarcat> wow this is crappy
[19:01] <@Shinji Ikari> christ james sucks at talking
[19:01] <writerstarcat> "oh, his rage will make more interesting sport than his futile attempt to protect you."
[19:02] <@Xadium> lol i want blade tro come kill all these posers
[19:02] <writerstarcat> Sadistic mofo
[19:02] <@Michael Dembeck> this.....is the worst fight scene EVER
[19:03] <writerstarcat> fifteen minutes @_@
[19:03] <writerstarcat> Wow she's clearly in pain.
[19:03] <writerstarcat> Or possibly orgasming.
[19:03] <writerstarcat> It's hard to tell.
[19:03] <@Xadium> the fight is okay but all the yoi grunting is not
[19:03] <@Shinji Ikari> She's wetting her panties
[19:03] <writerstarcat> unf unf unf
[19:04] <writerstarcat> Man Alice is totally a lesbian
[19:04] <@Darkness> Anyone following what's going on right now.
[19:04] <writerstarcat> look she's freaking straddling bella
[19:04] <writerstarcat> something
[19:04] <@Xadium> not really
[19:04] <@Shinji Ikari> I am!
[19:04] <writerstarcat> edward attacked the other dude
[19:04] <writerstarcat> then the rest showed up
[19:04] <@Shinji Ikari> Alice is about to do something awesome
[19:04] <@Shinji Ikari> like RIPPING OFF THAT GUY'S HEAD
[19:04] <writerstarcat> bella got superhurt and now she's orgasming/turning/whatever
[19:05] <@Darkness> THIS ISN'T EVEN SEXY
[19:05] <writerstarcat> No
[19:05] <writerstarcat> this isn't anything
[19:05] <@Shinji Ikari> They're now burning James' body
[19:05] <writerstarcat> om nom nom
[19:05] <@Shinji Ikari> HE'LL MAKE IT GO AWAY
[19:05] <@Michael Dembeck> SUCK HER OR SHE WILL DIE
[19:05] <@Shinji Ikari> WHILE YOU CUM
[19:06] <writerstarcat> LOL
[19:06] <@Darkness> will she stop gasping for air erotically. It's not working.
[19:06] <@Shinji Ikari> EDWARD GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF HER CROTCH
[19:06] <writerstarcat> "But it's so DELICIOUS"
[19:06] <@Darkness> did she just go CROSSEYED.
[19:06] <@Xadium> lol it's the only way to get people to keep watching
[19:06] <writerstarcat> oh -- neesan, add awkward flashback montages to the list
[19:06] <@Shinji Ikari> CRAPPY SONG PLAYING
[19:06] <@Darkness> hai.
[19:06] <@Michael Dembeck> ....SONG IS EVIL
[19:06] <@Shinji Ikari> BLAHBLAHBLAH
[19:06] <@Shinji Ikari> LEMME SIGNORSOMETHINGBLAH
[19:06] <writerstarcat> the f[BLEEP]k is with this song
[19:06] <writerstarcat> and why is her makeup so perfect
[19:07] <@Xadium> STELLA BELLA
[19:07] <@Shinji Ikari> bella this is what happens when you party hard, do drugs, and run a train with the football team
[19:07] <writerstarcat> "asleep"
[19:07] <@Xadium> i thought he never slept
[19:07] <writerstarcat> no no
[19:07] <writerstarcat> i don't usually curse at movies
[19:07] <writerstarcat> it's this f[BLEEP]king s[BLEEP]tfestic disgusting crap
[19:07] <@Shinji Ikari> You don't have to curse
[19:08] * @Michael Dembeck screams, banging his head against the wall
[19:08] <@Xadium> mike stop humping the wall
[19:08] <writerstarcat> unfunfunf
[19:08] <writerstarcat> mike
[19:09] <writerstarcat> if you hurt yourself
[19:09] <writerstarcat> and bleed
[19:09] <writerstarcat> i am sucking out your blood.
[19:09] <@Darkness> He's marking his territory guys.
[19:09] <writerstarcat> :9
[19:09] <@Xadium> why are there still 10 mins left
[19:09] <@Shinji Ikari> WE TOOK CARE OF IT means that they completely destroyed someone else's property to deal with a clusterf[BLEEP]k they created
[19:09] <@Xadium> WHY
[19:09] <writerstarcat> ',_,'
[19:09] <@Shinji Ikari> Good job Vampire
[19:09] <writerstarcat> really, really long credits...?
[19:09] <@Shinji Ikari> No NO
[19:09] <@Shinji Ikari> WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
[19:09] <@Michael Dembeck> Edward: I'm to dangerous and pretty, you must leave me
[19:09] <@Michael Dembeck> FUN FACT
[19:09] <writerstarcat> we can't be apart
[19:10] <writerstarcat> you can't leave
[19:10] <writerstarcat> why t he hell does she like this stalker assh at
[19:10] <@Shinji Ikari> EVER
[19:10] <@Michael Dembeck> Edward isn't in the next movie with her, and Wolf boy stars trying to get in her pants
[19:10] <@Shinji Ikari> Because she is one now
[19:10] <writerstarcat> f[BLEEP]k yes no edward
[19:10] <writerstarcat> edward is a creepy sparkling d[BLEEP]k
[19:10] <@Shinji Ikari> Wolf boy who later on becomes PEDO for her baby!
[19:10] <writerstarcat> is it over
[19:10] <writerstarcat> oh please be over
[19:10] <@Darkness> wait NEXT movie? Do we have to watch that one too?
[19:10] <writerstarcat> oh no
[19:10] <@Michael Dembeck> yes, we do
[19:10] <@Shinji Ikari> Wolf boy, from what I heard, actually had potential
[19:10] <@Michael Dembeck> we can't give up on this now
[19:10] <@Shinji Ikari> Before the writer ruined him
[19:10] <writerstarcat> it's not out for another year or two
[19:11] <writerstarcat> or more
[19:11] <writerstarcat> i hope
[19:11] <@Shinji Ikari> Derailed him and then made him 'imprint' on the baby
[19:11] <@Xadium> aww she's going to PROM
[19:11] <writerstarcat> i need lots of time between this
[19:11] <@Xadium> how magical
[19:11] <@Shinji Ikari> Which will reach maturity at the age of seven
[19:11] <writerstarcat> ...
[19:11] <writerstarcat> wait
[19:11] <writerstarcat> i am torn between commenting on prom or the imprinting crap
[19:11] <@Michael Dembeck> yes, she'll have a sexy adult body at age seven
[19:11] <writerstarcat> 1. that's not a prom dress it's a f[BLEEP]king homecoming dress
[19:11] <writerstarcat> prom is formal, b[BLEEP]ches
[19:11] <@Xadium> there;a difference?
[19:11] <@Shinji Ikari> And Pedowolf will be tapping it
[19:11] <@Xadium> ahh
[19:12] <@Shinji Ikari> THERE'S OUR FUTURE PEDOWOLF
[19:12] <writerstarcat> 2. jesus f[BLEEP]king christ someone take it away from Meyer
[19:12] <writerstarcat> no computers
[19:12] <writerstarcat> no typewriters
[19:12] <writerstarcat> no pens
[19:12] <writerstarcat> no paper
[19:12] <writerstarcat> nothing
[19:12] <@Darkness> his HAIR.
[19:12] <writerstarcat> don't let it happen DX
[19:12] <@Darkness> I don't CARE if he's a werewolf or some s[BLEEP]t.
[19:12] <@Michael Dembeck> Wolfy> hey, if you have a kid, can i sex it up?
[19:12] <@Xadium> i know
[19:12] <writerstarcat> His hair is...wolfy
[19:12] <@Shinji Ikari> It's a WIG
[19:12] <@Shinji Ikari> I think
[19:12] <@Shinji Ikari> Oh christ
[19:12] <@Shinji Ikari> MOAR FACTS
[19:13] <writerstarcat> NO
[19:13] <writerstarcat> NO MORE FACTS
[19:13] <@Shinji Ikari> Edward tried to pimp her off to the Wolf
[19:13] <writerstarcat> OH GOD ONLY SIX MINUTES
[19:13] <@Xadium> lol the WOLVES DESCEND
[19:13] <writerstarcat> i can last i can last i can last
[19:13] <@Michael Dembeck> OH SHI, DID WE JUST GET A HINT
[19:13] <@Xadium> wait what ikari
[19:13] * writerstarcat curls up and rocks back and forth
[19:13] * @Darkness drinks.
[19:13] * @Darkness just drinks.
[19:13] <@Shinji Ikari> yeah
[19:13] <@Xadium> VEGAS DISCO PORN NITE
[19:13] <@Xadium> PROM
[19:13] <@Shinji Ikari> I think, if i'm not mistaken, it happens in the last novel
[19:13] <@Shinji Ikari> due to her just-revealed pregger situation
[19:13] <@Shinji Ikari> he tries to get her to abort
[19:14] <writerstarcat> teenage pregnancy is cool
[19:14] <@Shinji Ikari> and says if you want a kid, you could just f[BLEEP]k the wolf
[19:14] <writerstarcat> if bella did it then so can i
[19:14] <@Darkness> no neechan don't. bad.
[19:14] <@Michael Dembeck> shinji, can i have a fact about the child birthing XD
[19:14] <@Shinji Ikari> 'cause the child had the risk of killing her... WHICH IT DID
[19:14] <@Shinji Ikari> OH CHRIST MIKE
[19:14] <writerstarcat> you sound like you really mean that neesan
[19:14] <@Xadium> GOD DAMN IT IS STILL GOING ON
[19:14] <writerstarcat> i think that since in this movie it counts
[19:14] <@Shinji Ikari> STILL ON
[19:14] <writerstarcat> it should count in real life
[19:14] <@Michael Dembeck> Edward gives her the C-section with his vampire teeeeeth
[19:14] <writerstarcat> stiiiilll on
[19:14] <@Darkness> i'm sorry the alcohol is kicking in.
[19:15] * @Darkness falls over.
[19:15] <@Shinji Ikari> My 'wanders aimlessly' remark I'm sure all of you now understand
[19:15] <@Xadium> thank you mike so much
[19:15] * @Xadium catches D on his lap
[19:15] <writerstarcat> a bit late
[19:15] <writerstarcat> only four minutes left
[19:15] <@Shinji Ikari> This is what happens when Mike and I starts to do research
[19:15] <writerstarcat> me isn't even listening at this point
[19:15] <@Shinji Ikari> We dig up f[BLEEP]ked up s[BLEEP]t!
[19:15] <writerstarcat> but
[19:15] <writerstarcat> is it worse than twilight?
[19:15] <writerstarcat> (can any movie be worse)
[19:16] <@Shinji Ikari> Just wait for the potential sequels!
[19:16] <@Xadium> this half wasn;t as bad as last half tho
[19:16] <@Shinji Ikari> I don't seem them not doing them now
[19:16] <@Darkness> FINISH. FINISH MOVIE.
[19:16] <@Darkness> FINISH.
[19:16] <writerstarcat> and x for the love of god this is the worst "chick flick" i have ever seen please don't call it that DX
[19:16] <@Darkness> FINISH IT.
[19:16] <@Shinji Ikari> considering how much it made the first week alone
[19:16] <writerstarcat> THREE MINUTES
[19:16] * writerstarcat starts counting down
[19:16] <@Darkness> FINISH IT.
[19:16] <@Xadium> it is the quintessence of a chick flick
[19:16] <writerstarcat> om nom nom?
[19:16] <writerstarcat> No.
[19:16] <writerstarcat> No.
[19:16] <@Xadium> prrtty boy abnd girl lots of overblown dialog and staring longingly
[19:16] <writerstarcat> it is not.
[19:16] <@Shinji Ikari> FLAWLESS VICTORY, FATALITY
[19:17] <@Xadium> EPIC FAIL
[19:17] <@Shinji Ikari> FOR NOW
[19:17] <@Shinji Ikari> DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNN
[19:17] <@Shinji Ikari> PILLOW BITING
[19:17] * @Michael Dembeck pulls up...the twilight wiki
[19:17] <@Michael Dembeck> :3
[19:17] <@Michael Dembeck> KIDDIES, LETS HEAR A STORY
[19:17] <@Darkness> I'm done.
[19:17] <@Xadium> jesus christ they have a wiki
[19:17] * @Darkness throws down her sake bottle.
[19:17] <@Darkness> ..
[19:17] <writerstarcat> one minute
[19:17] <writerstarcat> One minute
[19:17] * @Darkness picks it up, swigs for voiceover.
[19:17] <writerstarcat> ONE MINUTE
[19:17] * @Darkness throws it down again.
[19:17] <writerstarcat> come ooooooooooooooon
[19:18] <@Michael Dembeck> So, captain pasty and mary sue get hitched, and FINALLY f[BLEEP]k
[19:18] <@Michael Dembeck> and i quote
[19:18] <@Shinji Ikari> DUNDUNDUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
[19:18] <writerstarcat> so now she's crashing prom
[19:18] <@Michael Dembeck> During their honeymoon, Edward and Bella consummate their marriage. Soon after, Bella feels a bump on her belly and misses her period, and she realizes she is pregnant with Edward's child.
[19:18] <@Xadium> can we edit it to say worst movie ever
[19:18] <writerstarcat> ...
[19:18] <writerstarcat> instantly preggers
[19:18] <@Darkness> INSTANT PREGGERS.
[19:18] <@Shinji Ikari> IT'S LIKE ME
[19:18] <@Shinji Ikari> BUT NOT AS AWESOME
[19:18] <@Darkness> Sounds like a bad RPG affliction.
[19:18] <@Michael Dembeck> Her baby develops at an extremely fast rate, and she becomes very sick. She can't keep food down, and is dying. Also, the baby inside of her is so strong it has been breaking her ribs by accident. Edward had asked Jacob to try to convince her to kill the baby that was killing her, but Bella couldn't, because she loved it.
[19:18] * @Xadium shuts of fhte movie window qwith extreme prejudice
[19:18] <writerstarcat> WHO ELSE WAS INSTANT PREGGERS
[19:18] <@Shinji Ikari> I CAN INSTANTLY PREGGERS ANYONE I WANT TO
[19:19] * writerstarcat is away: i need healing mac and cheese
[19:19] * @Darkness is away: I need to buy more alcohol.
[19:19] <@Michael Dembeck> Edward then suggests for Bella to drink blood, and she becomes stronger. Soon after, Edward realizes that he can hear the baby's thoughts, and starts to love the baby when he hears that it "absolutely adores Bella." Jacob remarks that Edward could never hate anyone who loved Bella, which is why Edward did not hate him.
[19:19] <@Shinji Ikari> Now you guys know what I went through.
[19:20] <@Xadium> Wolman: well I love her too.
[19:20] <@Michael Dembeck> Bella accidentally causes her hardened placenta to detach, and Edward, Rosalie, and Jacob are forced to perform an emergency birthing. Bella's body is nearly destroyed in the process - several ribs are broken, she loses vast amounts of blood, and her spinal cord is snapped. She names her child Renesmee, but then her heart stops beating. Edward injects her heart with some of his own venom and bites her body in several places, turning Bella into a vampire.
[19:20] <@Xadium> Wolfman: so now i am immune.
[19:20] <@Michael Dembeck> Jacob imprints on Renesmee, unbeknown to Bella.
[19:20] <@Xadium> How pretty.
[19:20] <@Michael Dembeck> and there we go. Getting knocked up by a vampire, is bad end
[19:21] <@Xadium> For us because now she is immortal and can be annoying forever.
[19:21] <@Shinji Ikari> One and a half to be exact
[19:21] <@Michael Dembeck> AHA
[19:21] <@Michael Dembeck> GUYS
[19:21] <@Michael Dembeck> QUOTING AGAIN
[19:22] <@Michael Dembeck> After Bella is changed into a vampire by Edward Cullen, she becomes even more pale, with fuller lips and blood red eyes. Her hair comes down to her waist and a man on the streets says she has a rocking body and the face of a supermodel.
[19:22] <writerstarcat> ...baseball
[19:22] <writerstarcat> "rocking body"
[19:22] <writerstarcat> i wish i were a vampire
[19:23] <@Michael Dembeck> oh lord, i have another gem
[19:24] <@Michael Dembeck> Bella is described as having a very pale complexion with long, straight, dark brown hair and wide chocolate brown eyes. Beyond this information, a detailed description of Bella's appearance is never given in the series
[19:24] <writerstarcat> nooooo
[19:24] <writerstarcat> they're NOT gems
[19:24] <@Michael Dembeck> Stephenie Meyer explains that this is because she wanted her readers to "step into Bella's shoes" more easily. However, she has provided a more detailed description of her own interpretation of Bella on her website:
[19:24] <writerstarcat> polished turds are STILL CHUNKS OF S[BLEEP]T
[19:24] <@Michael Dembeck> she has a heart-shaped face, a widow's peak, a thin nose, and a narrow jaw with a pointed chin and full lips. Her fingernails are stubby, as she has a nervous habit of biting them. She stands at 5'4" and weighs about 110-115 pounds.
[19:24] <@Xadium> hahaha
[19:24] <@Shinji Ikari> BELLA IS A SKINNIER VERSION OF THE WRITER
[19:24] <@Michael Dembeck> Bella also has a small crescent-shaped scar on her hand where she was bitten by James, a tracker vampire, in Twilight. The scar is described as being pale, always a few degrees colder than the rest of her body, and shines like a vampire's skin when in the sunlight.
[19:24] <writerstarcat> bella is label
[19:24] <@Xadium> if i was a drinkign man i'd join shal in sake.
[19:25] <writerstarcat> sparkling.
[19:25] <@Michael Dembeck> *insert rocking body earlier part here*
[19:25] <@Xadium> the scar in the movie was huge.
[19:25] <writerstarcat> oh god i wish i had something to drink.
[19:25] <writerstarcat> like THE BLOOD OF VIRGINS OM NOM NOM
[19:25] * writerstarcat is a vampire
[19:25] <@Shinji Ikari> DO YOU SPARKLE
[19:26] <writerstarcat> only when dipped in glitter
[19:26] * writerstarcat attacks shinji and noms his neck
[19:26] <writerstarcat> OM NOM NOM SLUUUUUUUUUURP.
[19:26] <@Shinji Ikari> OH KIDDO =3
[19:26] <writerstarcat> jesus christ this is stupid
[19:26] <writerstarcat> what the f[BLEEP]k did this movie DO to me
[19:26] * writerstarcat shakes her head in self-disgust and just goes to see if her water is boiling yet
[19:27] <@Shinji Ikari> Once you've seen Twilight there's no going back
[19:27] <@Michael Dembeck> it got worse.
[19:27] <@Michael Dembeck> as a vampire sue, she gains ÜBER POWAHS
[19:27] <@Michael Dembeck> When she turned into a vampire, she had described that she is more clear in her view of the world. She is also very self controlled as a vampire, being able to run away from human blood. She also has a special gift, which is to shield her and those around her from being affected by other vampires special talents. Bella appears to have an aptitude for being a vampire, even saying that she felt like she was born to be one. Ironically, Bella is very graceful -- even for a vampire.
[19:27] <@Xadium> oh my god.
[19:28] <@Xadium> that is just
[19:28] <@Xadium> v_v
[19:28] <@Shinji Ikari> it's the ultimate mary sue
[19:40] <@Michael Dembeck> Imprinting from the twilight world
[19:40] * @Xadium leans back on unnamed sofa and relaxes
[19:40] <@Michael Dembeck> read and lol, read and lol
[19:50] * @Darkness is back
[19:50] * @Darkness has four new bottles of sake and one of baileys.
[22:33] * @Diamond Dice Darkness changes topic to `TWO GIRLS ONE MOVIE* WILL BE UP SOME TIME TONIGHTISH. *and three guys but they don't count`
[23:00] * @Xadium gets to work on editing the log
[00:13] *** Sun Nov 30 2008 - LOGGING STOP ***




 






[ This Comment awaiting Moderator Approval ]

• 01/24/12 07:26pm

http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/bum-reviews/2741-twilight

Just have to watch this, if others want to see a light hearted review of this floudering piece of crap. Also posted it in the ED Thread in the Ginga forums for more Twilight mayhem.

I am so sorry you had to suffer from this drabble written by a freshman hack.

YingGirl • 12/01/08 04:38pm



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