Suburban Senshi IRC Chat #1011: “Newsday Tuesday”
#1011: “Newsday Tuesday”

August 01st, 2006

[07:56] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Good morning, and welcome to Ginga TV's weekly roundup of news from the world of Anime, headlines courtesy of animenewsnetwork.com
[07:56] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> And others, if we're not too lazy to scrape the rest of the internet
[07:57] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> On July 10, Kadokawa relaunched Newtype Romance as a full-fledged magazine.
[07:58] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> The new issue features Kyo Kara Maoh! on the cover, the same property that was featured on the cover of the October 2004 issue. The October 2004 issue was a supplement in the October 2004 Newtype.
[08:00] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> So why did it take them two years to get this thing off the ground? Well even though it's based in Japan,even Kadokawa had trouble finding reporters willing to cover events such as "tubgirl and Mr. Goatse.cx go out for a stimulating night on the town at the Paris Hilton now animated on ytmnd.com" material that constitutes "newtype romance" in the internet age.
[08:02] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> FLOW will perform at AnimeFest, September 1-4 in Dallas.
[08:06] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> They swear they'll "paint the town red"
[08:06] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Yu-Gi-Oh!, Sonic X, and Kirby willl be available "soon" on Comcast's Video On Demand service.
[08:08] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Trial runs among elite otaku have apparently run into snags, with feedback forms littered with comments such as "You said 'Sonic X' but no matter how many times I press the red [interactive] button, he won't go 'Yu-gi-OH OH OHH!' with Kirby"
[08:08] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> ImaginAsian TV has signed a service deal with Optical Entertainment Network in Houston. The channel will be available on OEN's basic package, available to all of the network's 1.6 million subscribing households
[08:09] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Number of interested Texans?
[08:09] * [gTV]Karasuma_Akane takes out a sheet of paper and slowly writes something on it in big black felt tip marker
[08:09] * [gTV]Karasuma_Akane holds up the paper, which reads "0"
[08:10] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Ara, What about Billy Bob?
[08:10] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Billy Bob?
[08:11] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Ara, the one who asked 'are their hot asian chicks on the channel'?
[08:11] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> we don't count Billy Bob.
[08:11] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> The first Afro Samurai trailer is now online at IGN. The series premieres on Spike TV in November.
[08:12] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Everyone who's been told this has replied with in the same way:
[08:12] * [gTV]Karasuma_Akane cuts to a livecam footage
[08:12] <Random Generic Person> I don't get it, they already air "Blade the series"
[08:13] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Studio Ghibli's Gedo Senki, which is to be released in theaters this week, has received a 2.3 rating (out of 5) on Yahoo Movies Japan by people who have seen advanced screenings. Comparatively, recent anime TokiKake received a 4.7 grade, Pokemon a 3.9, and Brave Story a 3.0. Pixar's Cars has received a 4.2.
[08:14] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> In related news, Scientists reviewing the data have confirmed that on either side of the Pacific, s[BLEEP]t floats to the top.
[08:15] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> The fifth season of 4Kids TV begins this fall on Fox. Yu-Gi-Oh! Capsule Monsters premieres September 9, and Chaotic on September 30
[08:17] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> In a first, "chaotic" will be the rebranded "evolved form" of Yu-Gi-Oh! Capsule Monsters, wherein all the card creatures from "Capsule monsters", having suffered heatstroke-related brain dmamage due to being stuffed in unventilated red and white tinted ripoff pokemon vending machine capsules go "chaotic" and atart exterminating cute big-eyed whiny anime children. Starting with Chibiusa.
[08:18] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Satoshi Kon's Paprika, which is scheduled for a theatrical run next year in Japan, is also listed for an October 31 DVD release in America.
[08:20] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> The movie about a stuffed animal's hot and spicy cooking in the kitchen while trying to leap into the cleavage of both Inoue Orihime and Matsumoto Rangiku promises to be a big hit among the otaku set
[08:21] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> A note in the September issue of Shojo Beat informs that Kaze Hikaru will be replaced with Backstage Prince in October.
[08:22] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Well now we know the answer to the burning question asked by Former German Chancellor Helmut Koll--
[08:23] * [gTV]Karasuma_Akane cuts to the camera
[08:23] <Helmut Koll> Kan die Shojo Beat gettisch any MORE gayenschtuff?
[08:25] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Kaze Hikaru reportedly went into a foaming, livid backstage rant at the news, upsetting his lead crystal bowl of only red M&Ms onto the head of his silent brother Hideki, and setting fire to the hotl, screaming "Damn that Backstage Prince, he'll bend over for anything~! At least I have standards!"
[08:26] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> In related news Kaze Hikaru was seen dating Paris Hilton on night video sex tape this week
[08:26] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Kingdom Hearts volume 4 fell from #73 to #104 on this week's USA Today Booklist
[08:28] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Sales plummeted drastically after twitchy gamer nerds found that the dead tree format lacked side scrolling features or the ability to poke pluto in the nethers with a stylus or something
[08:28] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> *mutter* Seriously who the f[BLEEP]k makes a book about disney characters in Final Fantasy, it's like a retarded H doujin given marketing life
[08:29] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Ara, the mic caught that
[08:29] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> ...
[08:29] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> GOOD. GOOD. DO YOU HEAR ME DISNEY
[08:29] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> KINGDOM HEARTS IS A RETARDED PREMISE BORN OF MARKETING AND FAIL
[08:30] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> IT IS THE BA[BLEEP]RD CHILD OF EVERYTHING WRONG ABOUT ANIME AND MARKETING
[08:30] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> "OOH LET'S WATCH MICKEY GET ALL TOUGH AND WIELD A BUSTER SWORD"
[08:31] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> IT'S A DAMN MOUSE FROM A COMPANY SO REPRESSED IT HAS TO RESORT TO HAVING ITS ANIMATORS STICK D[BLEEP]KS ON THE COVERS OF ITS LITTLE MERMAID DVDS
[08:32] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> MICKEY IS ABOUT AS CREDIBLE A FIGHTER AS SNARF WITH CHAIN GUN
[08:32] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> SQUARE ENIX, JUST YOU REMEMBER WHAT THEY DID TO SIMBA, ERR I MEAN KIMBA!
[08:34] * The camera goes fuzzy as stagehands and Boss Minako run in to calm Karasuma
[08:34] *** PLEAST STAND BY. TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES
[08:34] * The picture shakily refocuses on Aya.
[08:34] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Ara...
[08:35] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> A trailer for Project Blue SOS is now online. The film will be released next February in Japan.
[08:35] * [gTV]Karasuma_Akane coughs
[08:36] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> The Cat III film all about the group of a bunch of well-meaning Otaku dedicated to saving their favorite anime by making a pr0n film in which everyone has an orgy in a sea of strawberry Pop-Tarts at the castle of "Prince Uranus" is expected to go over well at the Akhibara Film Festival, which is held every friday night in the basement of "Gamer's".
[08:40] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Breaking News: Sony has informed Twitch that Paprika will not be released on October 31: "Sony is planning a theatrical release of the film in 2007 with a DVD to follow sometime after that."
[08:40] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> I guess the cameramen want more time to remasterBLEEP to the shots of Rangiku's "cleavage of the gods".
[08:40] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Has been turned into a Geneon has posted a listing for an Anime Product Manager on Monster.com. The position involves "daily marketing projects" and "budgeting, planning and execution of all company industry tradeshows and conventions."
[08:40] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Former Anime Project Manager "Bob" tells us more about the job. His voice has been altered to protect his identity.
[08:42] <Former Anime Project Manager Bob> tHeY gIvE yOu a DoLLaR and mAkE yOu sWeAr tO thE OtaKu thAt 'tHiS tImE thE duB woN'T sUcK, hOneSt!'
[08:42] * Former Anime Project Manager Bob breaks down and cries
[08:42] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> A 90-second trailer for the third Naruto movie is now online. The movie opens next weekend in Japan.
[08:43] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> The movie will be 9*1* seconds long and be comprised entirely of a filler sequence composed of a slow zoom into Sakura's cleavage.
[08:43] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Bandai Visual USA's teaser site for Gunbuster is online.
[08:44] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> [SPOILER] : they ran out of money again so all you will get is a bunch of scribbled lineart and a voiceover by Mitsuishi Kotono promising you lots of fanservice next time
[08:44] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Ara, highlight that to read it ^_^;;
[08:45] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Lupin the 3rd: 70s Rhapsody will air in September on Japan's NTV network.
[08:45] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> What's the difference between 70's Lupin and Today's Lupin? The Afro will be twice as large.
[08:46] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Hayao Miyazaki has turned down an invitation to the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences for a third time
[08:47] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> The digital photo of Miyazaki's extended middle finger was cut from the mainstream press release
[08:48] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Miyazaki first declined the offer when he was asked by AMPAS two years ago if he could "brang us fhutage of summa dat pokey-man stuff ewe dew? We loves it in Amerikah~"
[08:49] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> The Jetix block, which features Digimon and Oban Star-Racers, will leave ABC Family on September 1. It will continue to be available on Toon Disney, where it is expected to grow by several hours in the fall.
[08:49] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Half a day. Of Jetix. On DISNEY.
[08:50] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> The insult, she writes herself.
[08:52] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Breaking news: Twitch reports Satoshi Kon's Paprika is "tentatively slated" for a March 2007 theatrical release in America.
[08:53] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> ....
[08:53] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> In a related story, Sony proves unable to MAKE UP IT'S DAMN MIND.
[08:53] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> Seven Seas Entertainment is looking for Japanese-to-English Translators for a "wide variety of translation projects."
[08:54] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> If it's the same "wide variety" as Digital Manga it means "Yaoi manga that no one but one closeted texan otaku the size of Arkansas will read."
[08:55] <[gTV]Aya_Reiko> The Funimation Channel is coming to Verizon's FiOS Premiere package August first.
[08:56] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Test views responded positively to hearing constipated SSJ3 Goku and Vegita screaming in agony for three hours in full digital clarity.
[08:59] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> And on that lovely note we leave you for the week, have a good one, Sweaty Otaku of the Planet.
[08:59] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> And by "good one" I mean maybe you'll get to hold someone's hand
[08:59] <[gTV]Karasuma_Akane> Without them filing for assault
[09:00] *** Disconnected
[09:00] *** Tue Aug 01 2006 - LOGGING END ***




 






Interesting gallery. Now, my Sailor Moon knowledge is limited, so, is Xadium a real character? He seems so intruiging!

Selrah [e-mail] • 08/03/06 12:09pm

Snarf with a chain gun? Now that would be badass to see! I see a new movie: Revenge of the Snarf

Jupiter Knight • 08/02/06 11:09am

starcat said: (Hint: there's no one named Kaze Hikaru)

Hey star go read the original headlines :O

"Shojo Beat: Kaze Hikaru Out, Backstage Prince In (2006-07-27 08:30:40)"

Who's not factual?

Dr. X • 08/02/06 07:18am

Suburban Senshi: Because you're only funny until you step on a sacred cow.

Dr. X • 08/02/06 06:48am

Nothing is more hilarious that ENTIRELY FACTUAL INFORMATION.

dooky • 08/02/06 12:35am

These started out being a funny way to read the anime news, but they're just kind of insulting now. The lack of fact-checking kinda shows with the mickey-and-buster-sword thing, as well as the Kaze Hikaru bit. (Hint: there's no one named Kaze Hikaru) Some parts are good, though. But please, more fact-checking for maximum funny! :<

starcat • 08/01/06 10:26pm

Yes, I did, but your comment was still incorrect, since Mickey does *not* use a buster sword in the game. At all. And I felt like pointing it out. And I would have thought you'd known better, but I guess not.

Adam • 08/01/06 09:37pm

Adam I was commenting on the log.
Jease, did you not read it?

Shaldra Darkness [e-mail] • 08/01/06 07:09pm

Funny thing, Shal, Mickey doesn't *have* or *use* a buster sword at all.

Do some fucking research next time.

Adam • 08/01/06 05:06pm

I fully agree with the Kingdom Hearts comment
FULLY
Giving Mickey Mouse a Buster sword does not make him cool, it makes him an open target for Cloud to attack, and Cloud would kick his ass.

Shaldra Darkness [e-mail] • 08/01/06 04:15pm

First season Digimon was the best. :P

Mel • 08/01/06 12:38pm

HEY! SOME OF US ACTUALLY LIKE TO WATCH DIGIMON! And why do people think of Digimon as a pokemon ripoff, HUH? >| *muttermutter*

Kakyuu-tachi [e-mail] • 08/01/06 11:28am



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